Travel diary

The Blogg now in order so easier to read

28th September 2007

We rode last night to Peter Henshaw’s house (Pod) After the most horrendous few days of trying to pack everything up. The campsite, my office, the flat, my horse and the goldfish.

We said so many farewells all of which made me cry. I can’t seem to say goodbye with out my eyes welling up. The worst goodbye was to my friend Vicky, what a star. She packed cleaned and kept us sane all the time while we were going into headless chicken mode. The packing of the bikes seemed to be a mammoth task in itself. There never seemed to be enough space. I had forgotten what we need and lost a grasp of what you can’t take with you. I guess the more you have the more luggage holds you back.

We had some food at Gary’s Mums with Lisa and Mathew (Gary’s kids) and Vicky. The conversation came around to the fact that we were both knackered and did we want to ride all that way tonight.

It was a cold night with a full moon crisp air and although both of us could have just curled up and slept we got on the road and again more good byes.

The four hours ride to Pod’s was really the first time we had ridden the bikes after all the work that Gary had done. My bike seemed to purr and it was like I had never left the saddle. A bit cold I tried my heated vest. Talk about luxury, toasty and cozy. I couldn’t get too comfy or my eyes would close. We arrived at 1am with a beer to greet us.

Journey to the first Ferry

Now I am not one to whinge normally but today was one of the hardest challenging rides I have ever done.

The morning was taken up with firstly Gary haven been given some riding trousers and the fact they cramped his bollocks. “Are these girls trousers?” There was no getting away from it Gary didn’t want to turn into a lady and his bollocks were something that were quite important to him. The trousers had to go. So with little time to spare we headed to the nearest bike shop. Gary all kitted up we headed to the shops for the things I had forgotten. I had even forgotten toothpaste amongst other things.

We knew we had wasted a bit of time in shops but we were not panicking.

Back on the road the day went from a fine day to pissing down. The rain was so hard it was coming inside my visor and flowing in little streams making it hard to see anything. We hadn’t set our autocoms up so we couldn’t talk to each other. Sense of humour gone we then hit the M25 “F**k” the traffic was terrible, choked right up. We filtered best we could through the traffic but big panniers and inconsiderate car drivers that wouldn’t move over, the going was slow. Gary rode beside me and pointed to his GPS and said there’s no way we are going to make it. I felt myself first of all start to well up and then I got angry. “Why the hell should these bloody cars stop us from getting our ferry?” We had paid £200 for a ticket and then I started to think not only of the money but what would we do if we missed the ferry? A long ride through Europe and another expensive ticket. Bugger that. I took lead and felt like a London courier weaving in out of the cars. On Straight bits I gave it beans where cars got in the way I revved my engine and caught the driver’s eye in their mirror. It was like the parting of a wave still raining we carried on to the A12. The traffic got better but I didn’t let up. I wanted to sleep in that cabin. A sign for Harwich gave me a sense of glee. Nearly there! Just keep swimming as Nemo says. We made it with 20 minutes to spare before the ferry left. Last on, we took what we needed off the bikes. “I can’t believe we made that.” I said to Gary “I didn’t think we had a hope in hell.”

We always seem to make things harder for ourselves, there never seems to be enough time. Or maybe we try to pack too much into our time. Either way it felt so good to be on that ferry.

24 hours later we docked in Denmark. Late getting out of the cabin we then had to re-pack the bikes. A big pile of stuff beside my bike. I looked at my panniers and wondered how it ever fitted. Why is that as soon as you take something out of a box it seems to get twice as big? A bit of pushing, tugging and shoving it all went back in, a bit like a loaded jack in the box.

We trundled off the ferry ramp “You the last ones?” A dockworker asked. “Yes” As usual but at least we made it.

Denmark seemed very flat and not very inspiring. I had discovered another problem on the ferry the space bar had gone wrong. It is very had to do anything on a computer without a space bar I discovered, you can’t write anything. So another shopping mission I decided to add to my exploding luggage and buy a keyboard to plug in to it. I might as well have brought my office with me. We already had too much stuff. Oh well. We left Denmark and then into Germany. We stopped at a supermarket. No keyboard but a great opportunity to waist yet more time chatting eating crisps and bumbling. Another town, another supermarket. They had keyboards but a shop assistance informed me that it wouldn’t work with my Mac. We asked if any shops in Hamburg would be open on a Sunday and he said yes, we are in the country and the computer shop there is the biggest in Germany. Happy with our progress to get my lappy back we headed for Hamburg. It got dark and started to rain again. Hamburg was still 2 hours away. We rode straight into town. “First hotel ok with you?” Gary shouted. A big thumbs up from me. I had only thin gloves on, as my big ones were still wet from England. I couldn’t feel my fingers any more and they felt like shovels attached to my arms. Numb, wet and cold we found a hotel and Gary went to see the reception. He came out and said that there was a festival in Hamburg and all the hotels are booked up. Dark wet and cold we then rode round and round town looking for somewhere to stay. After the 4th hotel Gary then ran out of petrol. On reserve we carried on to yet another hotel. I asked where the nearest fuel station was and if he had a room. It looked far too plush for us but worth an ask. No luck with the room but at least directions to a fuel stop. In the fuel station Gary painted a very pissed off picture. I tried to put on a brave face on things but it was nearly 11pm and still no place to stay. I decided to ask the man in the station He said there was a hotel not far from there which he thought would have a room. We followed his directions and came across it 25h a very pink hotel and looked quite trendy. We walked into the lobby and got ready for the knock back ‘we are full line.’ A smiley receptionist said ‘We have one room left, would you like to see it?’ “No” we both said at the same time, enough is enough. “We will take it.” At that point we heard thee rain outside move up a gear from a steady trickle to chuck it down in buckets mode. Our moods lifted with the thought that we could have been caught in that down pour, and although we were a little damp and stood in a pink lobby things could have been so much worse.

The room was spacious. Very trendy for trendys sake. Open plan amazing retro features, disgusting wallpaper like a bad taste party shirt and then there was the concrete ceiling.... Why? Nice room to some ones taste (not mine) but could they not finish it. Some design buff must have said that was cool and the simplicity of the grey concrete was pleasing to the eye. All that considered it had a bed, a shower and somewhere to dry our wet gear. We had dinner in the bar didn’t realize the time 12am, good time to eat but needs must.

After a good nights rest we headed into town on the bikes to try and get the damn keyboard. Hamburg seemed to take on a new light and looked very different to the night previous in the dark and rain. It is funny how you can judge a place really by your mood. I wonder how many places I have written off as crap just because I was in a bad mood. I suppose it goes the other way too. You could have really good memories of a place but really it is a shit hole to anyone not happy in them selves.

We waited for the computer shop to open. Success a keyboard, a bit big but needs must. I could put wheels on it and drag it behind me.

After a computer shop overload in riding kit far too hot for shopping we then set off to try and find our freight boat ‘Hornline” we found it and stopped by a kiosk with a little man saying we could not go any further.

‘But we are booked on that boat tomorrow.”

“Then come back tomorrow.”

“Can we see it from the road?” we asked

“Yes from the bridge.”

We headed back down the road and from there we could see our boat which tomorrow would be our home for 19 days to Costa Rica. I got butterflies looking at it. The longest I had been on a boat for was 2 days and that was when I was a kid with my Dad. We sure as hell didn’t cross the Atlantic then. I gulped with the thought. We headed back to the hotel and packed our stuff best we could. We didn’t really know much about the boat and didn’t know if we would be able to see or get to our bikes so we thought it best to make everything easy to take off.

 

1st October 2007

7 am the alarm goes off I was almost waiting for it to play it’s little tune so I was allowed to get up as I was already wide awake and wired. I hate it when I feel like this I usually make mistakes and panic. No good for anyone. It took 3 lift journeys to take our stuff down to the bikes and then there was the dreaded packing task. By now it was 8.30 and we had to be there between 9 and 10. We stopped off at a garage had some breakfast and Gary announces that he needs a poo... bloody hell a poo at this stage in the game. Why do men take so long to poo? I waited patiently by my bike, helmet on ready for a quick get away. Gary swaggered back “do you know it is 9.30

“You’re joking, right.” Gary looks at his watch

“I wish”

Another dash to chase another boat. We got to the kiosk we visited the day before and this time we allowed through.

“Blue container” the kiosk man said “Security”

We parked up and now my heart was pounding it all seemed real now. I need a fag! We got our passes and was met by a guy in a van,

“Horncap?” he shouted to us

“Yes”

“Follow me.”

We followed the van through boxes, containers forklifts and lots of men in florescent jackets and hard hats.

We then had our first sight of the ship close up. My Christ that’s big. We were told to park next to the gangplank and I thought we would create a load of hassle but no. A few guys looked at the bikes

“Do we need to unload them?” I asked a man

“Yes”

“Do you want to load them now?” I asked, waiting for lots of information.

“Later” with that he wondered off. Great, man of so many words made things so much clearer, not.

Ok so we just better get the stuff off then. A man came down and said that he would show us to our cabin. He helped us with our gear and then on to the boat. Little steps up the gangplank with heavy bike gear and about 5 bags really were hard going. It seems to be the only down side with a bike your fine when you are on the bike but get off and you turn into a fish with no water.

The cabin was great, campaign, chocolate flowers and crisp white sheets. Oh yes, I could get used to this but we were supposed to be on a hardy road trip.

Back at the bikes the anticipation that they may be loaded. We waited around watching the boat being loaded with brand new cars. They drove two cars on the ramp and then lifted them with a crane into the ships hold. It all looked a bit wobbly and left the question of now how would they lift our bikes. All would come clear I suppose. We had dinner on the boat, 3 courses. Really nice food. We were handed a food schedule. Breakfast at 7.30 am, Dinner at 11.30am, tea and cake at 3.30pm. Dinner at 7.30 pm. It seemed a lot of food and not much to do in the way of exercise. We usually loose weight when we travel but I think way may end up a couple of porkers not able to even get on I bikes let alone ride them.

Not much in the way of loading bikes we decided to go back into Hamburg by taxi and buy a few more things. My panic bought shoes was now killing me big blisters on both heals. I decided to buy yet another pair of shoes. Christ knows how much money we have spent on this trip. Its not way we normally travel. I re-mortgaged my flat for this and worked like a demon. All the same I wasn’t going to be uncomfortable in shitty shoes for 19 days on a boat.

We caught another taxi back to the port. I was worried that they might have loaded our bikes while we were gone. As the taxi pulled up to the boat I felt a sense of relief, as they were still where we left them amongst lots of port mayhem and activity. More waiting and we got chatting to Irish guy who worked with the loading team. I asked how they were going to load the bikes

“They don’t know yet, and if I was you I would make sure you are around.”

“Do you know when they will load them?” I asked

“ After the cars, there was a cock up and they are having to be re-shuffled in the hold, we don’t mind, more overtime no rush.”

It was now getting dark we had dinner and met our fellow passengers. All a little dull apart from one guy called Fabian who we both took a shine to. He was from Argentina a sweet oldish guy who reminded me of Paddington Bear, I don’t know why. Gary explained we wanted to learn Spanish. His eyes lit up. “No problem I will teach you if you help me with me English.”

We were in the bar and dashing in and out looking to see if they had moved the bikes. Gary knocked on the window. “They are loading them.” I ran to get my camera and was down the gangplank in a shot. They had strapped them into a cradle thing and they looked like little horses in a stable. An hour later a big hook was lowered from the ships crane and then attached to the cradle. The next minute our precious bikes were swinging through the air. I thought how cool they looked our Flying Hondas. It all happened so quick all that waiting was over. Gary shot up the gangplank to see the bikes in the ships hold. They gave him a yellow hard hat and he went down to see how they were strapping them. All good we sat and had a drink in the bar. I felt that we could relax now a hectic few days chasing boats but we had made it and I think we both needed a bit of a rest and we have 19 days to do that. Next stop Costa Rica.

The boat was supposed to leave at 10pm and then 12pm then 4am. We finally left at 7.30am. It was really exciting to feel the ship moving and a sense of relief that were finally on out way.

Louise Hillier and Gary Prisks Journey September 28th 2007

7th October

Woke up feeling a lot better the sea had calmed down and then the sun was coming up bright orange and red over a dark blue sea. Gary seemed a little fed up ‘If they said we could get off tomorrow I would be glad’ shit 12 days to go and already we were going a little mad. The truth is we had worked so hard for this trip and the boat had given us a chance to re-charge our batteries we had nothing to think about. What to eat, who was washing up? All taken care of. A chance to assess everything without the clutter of everyday chores but the novelty was wearing off and we were now ready to get on the road only we were in the middle of the Atlantic. No roads here.

We had a chance to see and feel dry land at the Azores and though it was only a quick shuttle like trip around the island. It was just what we needed. An amazing island stunning views. All too quick though, we were whisked round the place in a taxis. Then a call from the boat as they had finished loading they were ready for the off. The taxis driver then went from whisking to blending and sped towards the dock with his brill creamed hair (a stain above his door proof of his hair slicking was not just for us) We paid his fee and with that we were back to being in the middle Atlanrtic with the rumble of the ships engine.

The days seemed to move more slowly and now it was my turn for cabin fever I woke up in a very bad mood nothing was right and the grey sky and rough sea gave me no reason to feel any different. My mood changed at lunch it was like a sketch out of Monty Python. We all sat roundtable clothed tables with a jug of water and three courses to get through. The boat was going nuts up and down like riding the whoops too slow we tried to eat the food put in front of us. Up eat, fast. Down grab jug, glass plate and anything else on the table before it is following the motion of the boat. It was like eating a three-course meal on a roller coaster.

We went through a storm and it was the strangest sound the rain seemed to fizz as it hit the ocean. What a weird place. I have been though the desert and even though the desert seems like nothing lives there. If ever you wanted a pee or stopped and looked there would always be some sort of life be a bug, bird (or a man, that you didn’t know where he came from) In the middle of the ocean there seemed to be nothing no sign of life just blue meets blue.

Two weeks on the boat we had managed it and we had crossed the Atlantic and were now crossing the Caribbean Sea we came into port at Guadeloupe I had a mobile signal so could contact home. It was great to hear from everyone again the last time we spoke to anyone was the week previous and we had the news that the campsite had been broken into. Windows smashed and doors kicked in. Great news when at that point had only been at sea for a week.

We took an excursion with our fellow passengers around the island. What a great place markets full of spices, vegetables and fish, waterfalls and rain forests We had lunch in a restaurant over looking the sea. Gary and I then had to make sense of the menu in French. I asked for fish with no bones and Gary the same but a different dish. Mine turned up looking like what used to but a fish but Gary’s a big pile of tentacles, well it didn’t have any bones I suppose.

Now the 6th October and we have been aboard for 6 days. The routine of the boat life stops us from getting bored. Mainly eating DVDs and drinking just like home really. We had a welcome party last night, a lovely meal. All the crew are from the Ukraine and Russia We got talking to one of the officers who ended up drinking with us and smoking Golden Virginia he said that he hadn’t smoked for years very drunk we stumbled back to our cabin. Gary locked the door and thought that I may have gave the wrong impression ‘A bit too friendly’ and thought we might end up with more than just us in the room. After the previous nights adventures I awoke to feel far from normal the sea had got very rough and joined with a hangover gave me no option than to lay on my bed and feel sorry for myself. Ah but I wasn’t sick!

15th October - The ships BBQ.

A big long table was laid out for us ships crew at one end and us and other passengers. Great BBQ, free beer flowing, everyone taking photos from the bridge. One of the officers wearing white shorts was leaning over also taking photos Gary whispered to me “Wouldn’t it be funny to tell him his cock was hanging out as from the angle we were sitting you could see right up his shorts, we couldn’t see anything but he didn’t know that. Gary and I pointed to his leg he looked down and sheepishly went off confused and thinking that we had seen his manhood. We then felt guilty and thought maybe we had hurt his feeling. I later went on the bridge and saw the officer we had embarrassed through the window I smiled and gave him the thumbs up. I later thought about it and this probably had made matters worse “Yeah baby, have seen your bits and they are just fine.” He probably thought. Oh dear. After the BBQ we went to the bar and drunk vodka with our chief steward Sergey.

16th October

Woke up and my head felt like it was in a vice and oh what I would have given to be on dry land right now. Hangover and feeling like shit we had our last Spanish lesson with Fabian who was getting off at our next stop Cartenjena Columbia. We caught site of the port in the dark and said goodbye to sweet Paddington Bear with a cheeky smile and a great sense of humor.

Gary and I started to get concerned about the bikes as the loading crew, which got on were like ships rats. They were everywhere. We hadn’t seen the bikes since the Azores and hoped they would be ok.

17th October Columbia /Turbo

The boat left Cartenjena at 8.30am and we had a day swimming in the deck pool and on the running machine (Guilt for drinking so much at the ships bbq and convinced that I had put on 3 stone since boarding this floating restaurant) As the boat chugged towards Torbo the skyline changed to blue and purple mountains with clouds hanging in an angry sky. The water had turned green and murky and was completely flat when we loaded our bikes in Hamburg only 17 days ago we met the ships cargo planner. He was really interested in our bikes and told us that our bikes the bikes should be fine just watch out in Turbo. “They have sticky fingers there, maybe get the ship can get you a tarp or something” We were now only half an hour from Turbo and our bikes were in the hold where all the bananas were going to be loaded.

Decided to make a bit of a fuss and Gary was given permission to move the bikes. Thank god he did, as the hold where the bikes were was empty and our bikes very easy targets. Two days in Turbo and onwards to our final destination on our banana boat.

19th October

Arrived in Costa Rica and although explaining to the ships steward that no we really didn’t want to go on a tour we were herded like sheep towards a waiting minibus. “We want to see the bikes being unloaded.” I said to Sergay

“No problem the unload them tomorrow no problem.” That seemed to be his answer to everything. Ah well a tour with our fellow lemmings and we saw a bit of Cost Rican wildlife. 3 hours later we got back to the dockside and there were our bikes.

Mine a bit scuffed and had gained some red paint from somewhere. Indicators bent and then we noticed a few bits missing. Bastards.

The dockworkers looked really dodgy and their folk lift driving not to great either. One crashed into the post right by our bikes. We just wanted to get the hell out of there. So asked if we could go now?

Customs was the reply and was told that our agent would be out to the boat soon. Time was getting on and now 4.30 decided to go to the customs gate ourselves. No joy you need an agent. Our agent arrived and told us that due to the fact that it was Friday our bikes could not go through customs till Monday.

29th October

Will fill in the missing bits of diary as soon as I can’t do everything it seems. We got our bikes out of Costa Rica customs. Got on the road and are now staying with friends. Have seen a volcano got wet through in mental rain and fed crocodiles chicken from a bridge so all is good. Heading for Panama early tomorrow.

1st November

We are now in Panama City. Had the worst day riding I have ever had yesterday.

We rode from David to Panama City 480kms. Met a lovely guy called Luigi from

Italy. He has ridden from Alaska. Met him at the border crossing and he rode

with us to Panama city. I bet he wishes he didn’t now. We had really heavy

rain and felt like someone was throwing marbles at you then later in the day

With only 40 kms to go on the Pan Am my bike front wheel caught in a crack in

the rode. It sent it into a fish tailing effect I tried to get it back under

control but going around 65mph and lots of weight on the on the back nearly

got it back but then went down. I slid for what seemed like forever and could

see the tarmac wizzing past. SHIT!!!! The road was really busy and a fuck off

great big red truck behind me. As I was sliding I saw Luigi go past also out

of control and he ended up in the gully between the two carriageways. Gary

didn’t see what happened and went on. I stood up and could not believe that I

could. I was quite composed, I didn’t panic. I switched the bike off then ran

Over to Luigi “You ok?” he sat there but seemed ok too. I then went back to my

bike and with help put it upright again. The pannier box was caved in and bent

and the hand guard very scuffed but that was all. We righted Luigi’s bike and

His brand new KLR had a few scars but was ok to ride. I then started to

realize what had happened and felt like I was going to cry. Luigi said we had

better get out of here because of the police. Gary came back and went very white with what had happened. We rode to Panama City bruised but ok and then Gary got a puncture!!!

Fixed that with Luigi and I comparing notes on what the hell had happened he had come off avoiding me. I am quite glad he did apparently at one point he could see my head in front of wheel. YICKES.

Headed in to the city and ended up in an expensive shitty hotel but there was a bar next door and that made things a little better.

So there you go yesterday I should have stayed in bed!!!

3rd November

Bruises now a bit better and Gary sorted out my bent pannier. I keep thinking now how lucky I was. We booked our bikes on the flight to Quito Ecuador yesterday. Took all day to sort out but they are with the freight forwarder now and we are now bike less in Panama city. The bikes can’t fly till Wednesday so we are probably flying out ourselves on Monday. Had a hot day today and watched the parades as it is Panama celebrations which basically means that everything is shut for 3 days and there is a lots of men dressed in white uniforms doing what looks like Monty python funny walks. Very funny.

4th November

Moved hotels to a cheaper hotel put all our stuff in a taxi and Luigi followed on his bike. He is going to Columbia and we were thinking of joining him but got scared and decided after reading the embassy reports that we didn’t want to be kidnapped or mugged. (Funny that) Spent the afternoon watching yet more parades. The girls in the parade looked a bit kinky with high boots and mini skirts. Luigi’s eyes lit up when it started to rain he took lots of photos. I think he had his own personal wet tee shirt competition.

8th November

The bikes and us have made it to Quito Ecuador and we are planning to get on the road again Sunday. Customs took all day to get the bikes out and now Gary is repairing the bent bits on my bike. Not too much damage, my pannier box was the worst, it is 3 mm thick and it went right through. We have had a look around the old town today and bought bits and pieces for the bikes. It is amazing what you can find. It is like a maze of little shops everything on display behind glass. Ideal for us as we can just point. It seems to rain every afternoon here so we are planning to get up quite early on Sunday. It is also very high up 10000 feet above see level so just walking up stairs makes you out of breath. Haven't managed to put any pictures on the site yet will keep trying.

10th November

Decided as we were so close to go to the equator and step over the line, well it has to be done I suppose. My bike was still having bits set with Araldite so rode without a screen or headlight cowl. The bike looked quite strange. Almost like a rat bike. As we rode out of the hotel garage the heavens opened. We seem to have a big rain cloud following us. I don’t think I have ever ridden in so much rain. We took a few wrong turns and ended up miles away from where we wanted to be. Sheltered in a café and waited for the rain to give up. It didn’t so we just got back on the bikes. My trousers were far from waterproof and sitting on the bike felt like a cold puddle. We found the equator and it turned out to be like lands end only with lots of loud shit music and people selling crap trinkets. There was an orange line showing where North and South divided and a building with a globe on top. It was getting late so took some photos and back to the hotel. The rain had now turned up the volume and because we are so high it was cold to. I had to put my winter gloves and heated waistcoat. The traffic was really heavy like London but with electric buses whizzing past mad taxi drivers cutting you up. We got to some traffic lights and sat waiting for them to change. I felt a big bump and turned around the car behind me nudged me, I shouted to Gary “That car wanker just ran into me” I put my horn and tried to get out of the way the car then it rolled into Gary. “What the fuck” Then he rolled into both of us. We managed to get out of the way and looked in the window of the car. The guy was asleep!! We had sounded both horns but he hadn’t heard a thing. The guy then woke up and took off up the road with every obscenity Gary and I could muster. What a tosser!! He could have at least said sorry. Wet through we are getting on the road tomorrow. I hope it stops raining. It’s like being in England but I have heard you have got sunshine.

14th November

Well the last couple of days have been a mixed bag. We left Quito early in the morning and got some miles under our belts. It felt good to be on the road and as we made our way down the pan am mountain roads we both felt good getting out of the city. I was still quite shaken from my accident and I think Gary found it quite frustrating with me bumbling behind having my own personal panic attacks about cracks in the road. We met some other bike travelers on GSs. Had a long chat with them and then back to mile munching. They turned off at Banos and we carried on. It wasn’t long after that the rain started again. The scenery was bleak we stopped to change gloves and I could see my breathe. Cold and wet we carried on. The elevation in some parts was 3500 meters. I was stoked with my heated vest kept me warm. Getting dark we dropped down to a little town called Alausui.

The next day we headed off as early as we could but couldn’t get out of the hostel as the staff didn’t seem to want to get out of bed to unlock the gates. The sun was out and the roads were like playing an arcade game. Pothole, pig in gutter, rock falls, dogs flying out from nowhere to try and eat you, random dirt road with more potholes usually on a corner so just to try and catch you out. Tell you what it gave me more to think about than just cracks in the road. We stopped in Cuenca and had some lunch. We couldn’t park the bikes where we could see them but the place seemed safe enough. On the way back Gary decided to have his boots polished. I went back to check the bikes. I looked at my to discover that my blue bag was gone. FUCK, I ran back to Gary. He leapt off the shoe-polishing chair. They had stolen my pack containing my heated waistcoat, Levi jeans and all out toiletries. Went to the police like they were helpful, not. After a lot of swearing and bit of crying we decided to press on. We got about 15kms down the road I looked up at the threatening sky and realized that my waterproof trousers had also gone. I made pointy gestures referring to the clouds and then pointing to my trousers and shaking my head. We stopped and decided to turn back to the shitty thieving town. Found a supermarket and replaced my waterproof trousers and my pants. I wouldn’t mind only I had bloody washed the ones they took. I wish they had been stinking for the thieving shits.

Yesterday we rode to Vilcabamba more rain and the waterproof trousers I bought split as I pulled them over my boots and then as I got on the bike a big ripping sound as the crotch also gave in. Oh yeah I love this! We had a thunderstorm above us I was sitting in yet another puddle and going down mountain roads. The light at the end of the tunnel was the amazing place we found to stay. Really hot shower in lovely cabin. Bikes outside safe www.rendezvousecudor.com

19th November

Sorry haven’t had much of chance to update the diary as we have been on the road everyday and tried to eat up the miles. The landscape has been amazing a silky tarmac road beside the sea. Towns that smell of fish and other towns that just smell. Peru seems to be very, very poor and in places Gary and I compared it to Africa only you sort of expect it there. We are now riding with a fellow Brit called Tim on a GS. We have just today ridden through the devastated area of Pisco and were really shocked. The people hit by the earthquake had nothing much to start with, a very sad sight. We are now at an Oasis for Gary’s Birthday and hope to watch the sunset in the dunes tomorrow.

24th November

The last few days we have been just riding and sleeping trying to gat to Cusco. It has been a bit of a mission but we made it here yesterday with a storm following us through the mountains. We have been riding in very high altitude and the both our bikes have been struggling and burping up the steep mountain roads at one point we were at 4500 meters. Getting off the bikes made you tired and it was really hard to catch your breath. It was really weird how everything expanded. At one stop I thought my top box had come open but it was the roll mats inside the box. They had expanded so much that it had pushed the box lid nearly open. I pulled out a shampoo bottle from my pack and it had bloated into a really funny shape. Silly move I opened the lid. Splat, it exploded in my face I had white shampoo all over my face. Gary and Tim didn’t find it funny at all, not much. They could hardly get back on their bikes through laughing. The villages in the mountains were like how imagined Peru to be. Really friendly all the kids in their wooly hats seemed to wave as you past them and made you feel quite special. The views were something else big snow capped mountains that looked like they had been carved. The roads were swooping and switch back bends. You seemed to just get out of one corner and you were into the next one. Motorbike heaven!

Yesterday we were in another little town I had some chicken soup (which really was a chunk of chicken a few noodles in a bowl of luke warm white water) on another plate came a sliced up chili and lime. I tried to give the soup a bit of a kick and plopped the chili in the murky water. Flipping heck that’s hot I thought and started coughing. I spooned the chili back on the plate from which it came from and carried on slurping my soup. I had had enough and Gary being Gary inspected my plates for what he could eat. A bit of bread and is that red pepper? He picked the chili up in his fingers put it on the bread and was just about to eat it. “Chili” I said just in time. Just about to jump on the bikes again Gary went for a pee and came back looking far from happy. My willys burning and eyes watering asked what to do. Milk works I said water will make it worse. We just so happened to have some evaporated milk left over from an earlier tea on the road session. Gary went off to the toilets and came back still not happy I forgot to wash my hands first and I think I made it worse. His pain did go but it was really funny to think of him dunking his balls in evaporated milk.

28th November

Well we have been in Cusco for 5 days now and although we have not been on the road it hasn’t been with out its events. The day we arrived in Cusco we met a guy called Geoff who owns the Norton Rats Bar in the main square of Cusco. He recommended us a hostel and we went for more than a few beers in his bar. A great fun night though the next day my head did pay. Hangovers are bad enough at the best of times with out being at altitude and that seemed to make things worse. Hangover over the next day Gary got food poisoning. It was really scary to see him that ill and he threw up all night. Luckily here you can buy antibiotics over the counter and with a bit of bad Spanish and miming the girl in the chemist handed over the drugs to make Gary better. It took Gary 2 days to start feeing himself again.

The bikes are in the hostel courtyard and as we walked past I smelt petrol. “Gary your bikes leaking.” We were going to go out but thought we had better switch the petrol off and move the bike incase someone walked past with a fag. Pushed the bike with the petrol switched off and it was still pissing out. Shit we had better sort this one out. On closer inspection the bike was leaking petrol from the air box. What the??? Tools out and Gary undid the air box. Petrol came gushing out. He found the problem it was our new Touratech locking petrol caps!!! The cap doesn’t seem to breathe and at this altitude in the sun the plastic tanks got pressurized then add the fact that we couldn’t seem to find chain lube anywhere and we had been coating our chains with engine oil which flings everywhere when riding had blocked the carb breather, so long and short. Petrol tank pressurized then pushed petrol into carb no carb overflow pushed petrol into engine that then pushed petrol into air box then all over the floor.

Gary pulled the spark plug out and pressed the start button to get some of the petrol out. It spurted everywhere. Out of the engine and exhaust. Are you sure you should do that? I said my mechanical knowledge not that good but know that petrol everywhere could cause a fire. Its fine I was told I’ve got to get the petrol out of the engine somehow.

Won’t be having a fag too close then. I sat with Tim across the courtyard and he was telling stories of how he once went to a scrap yard where a guy working on his car petrol everywhere and his mate was throwing lit matches at him. You see its not the petrol itself that is flammable it is the fumes.

I looked back at Gary still tinkering with his bike. Then WHOOF flames shot out of Gary’s bike. Fuck Me.... WATER. Everyone from the hostel ran around to try and find some water Gary stayed by his bike blowing on it. Wet towels and buckets of water his Dommie survived with not a torched bit on it.

We must of gave our land lady a heart attach, scared the shit out of me.

We left the bike in search of a motorcycle shop bought new oil drained the bike took the exhaust off and then fired it up. Without the flames, thank god.

Yesterday we went to Machu Picchu on the train we were up at 4.30 am to catch the train but it was well worth it an amazing sight. An Inca city set high up in the mountains.

We are back on the road tomorrow and on our way to Bolivia then we have changed our route slightly and we are heading to Buenos Aires to ship to Oz as it seems to be cheaper. 3500 kms to ride before we can ship out.

30th November

We made it into Bolivia from Cusco in one day. A 550 km ride. We rode the most amazing roads through the mountains. The road seemed to follow a railway track and the road changed from sweeping mountain bends to big wide open spaces the hills were coloured a yellowish green with a strip of black tarmac in between. We arrived at the border and met some guys in a big overland truck with 12 passengers. We were going to stop at Puno Puru but after a conversation with the overland bus driver who said a few days before he had been held up at gun point for money was really glad we moved on. The border was very quiet and our timing seemed really good as a big storm was following us and we got through customs just before they shut. We arrived at Cococabama just before dark found a hotel and headed out for something to eat. I said as we walked down the road that it seemed really quiet. As we had our dinner a carnival kicked off outside they had big bands and seemed to be doing a dance a bit like the Hacka in traditional dress. Very strange. We have seen so many carnivals on the road it seemed almost the norm. Our Spanish is still so bad that we never seem to know what the hell is going on..

1st Dec

We had a day chillin in Cococabama. We sat by lake Titicaca had a coke and soaked up the sun

2nd December

Today was one of the most memorable rides I have ever had. We got on the bikes at 9.30ish and rode for about 30km on a road beside the lake. We stopped to have breakfast with a view to die for. It was so quiet no one around and as we drank our coffee looked over the lake and the sculpted terraced hills. Another 10km and we arrived at the ferry town. Ferry now that makes you think of P & O with well organized boats to shuttle your vehicle across the water. Oh no this was Bolivia. Basically planks of wood with big gaps between a small outboard engine to propel the raft like thing with coaches and cars onboard across the lake. A coach was ahead of us and we were directed on behind him. The crossing was with out too much rocking and was ok but then we realized that there was only one way on and we were going to have to back the bikes off. I watched the shoreline approach and was really worried as to how we were going to get the bikes off. I had visions of three bikes sinking. As it was we got one bike off at a time backwards and Gary me and Tim pulled each bike over the old gappy planks. The coach driver was a bit pissed off that we took so long and started bibing his horn. What a twat.

We then drove towards La Paz and after dicing with the traffic in the rain we ended up coming down a mountain road which made you feel sick, it was so so high up with La Paz stretching out into the distance. We then ended up on a very muddy track with big buses coming the other way. I stood on my pegs following Tim and Gary and just prayed that I wouldn’t end up on the deck in the sticky muddy mess I was ridding over. We had been really cold earlier and it was amazing as we wound our way down the road the temperature suddenly warmed up. We are now camping outside a hotel warm and worn out. We had only ridden 150 kms but it felt like 4 times that.

4th December

The last two days riding have been a mixed bag. From La Paz we headed for a town called Oruro. What a dusty dump of a place! We managed to find somewhere to stay but the toilets were like something out of train spotting. I know we are hard tough travelers but I think that a sink full of backed up shit is beyond the call of duty. We had dinner in a restaurant recommended in the Lonely Planet which said had amazing food, complete lie! Anyway long and short either the nasty hotel or dodgy food I got the shits for the 3rd time this trip!!! Not nice. Just about made it to Potosi before I exploded. Which was a real shame because the scenery was really dramatic like something out of a western.

We had met two other bikers on the road a guy on a Aprillia who chatted for a bit and said he had just ridden the worst road of his life and had fallen off 5 times. We said that we are going on the other paved road as we thought there were two. We arrived at a hotel in town and I spent the rest of the day and night in bed or on the toilet. Gary went out to find information on the roads and we discovered to our horror that there is only ONE road to the border and it is 500 kms of dirt. It is now the rainy season in Bolivia and last night there was an enormous storm. I don’t know if storms sound louder here as we are so high 4200 m or if the rainy season has started with a bang but we are both worried as to the condition of the roads. They say it is 12 hours in a bus to the border so we are heading out early and hope to make it to Tapizi. We have only road tyres and a can of petrol. SHIT!!!!

8th December

Right we made it out of Bolivia the off road nightmare turned out to be the most amazing scenery and breathtaking views yet.

10th December

Thought I had better get you up to speed as we haven’t had much of a chance to go into any internet cafes. The day we left Potsi I was really sick in the morning but got on the road anyway, we just wanted out of there we were both really fed up with Bolivia and being ill we were both craving some normality. So we headed out on to the dirt road with lots of different information. The roads are terrible, the buses struggle, there is no petrol and it is really cold!! The road turned out to be half paved and the rest dry rocky tracks which our Dommies coped with lovely though mine got a bit shaken and the repairs from the crash let go so my screen was a bit of a baggy mess by the time we hit tarmac again. We are both feeling ourselves again and I think that altitude really messes with your head. I know that it makes my petrol tank swell up so god knows what it does to your brain. Any way as we went down in altitude our moods improved and so did the temperature it has now warmed up lovely. The border into Argentina took 3 hours to get through but worth it. As soon as you get across the line things get better.

We rode to Salta and on the way I had the misfortune to be following a pissed moped rider. Gary was a head of me and a guy on a moped came flying into a round about and then hit gravel. It all happened so slowly and I saw his head hit the ground with such force and with no helmet on I thought he was dead then the bike and him came to a stop on the kerb. He was motionless. Gary didn’t see what happened and had gone on. I parked my bike and ran towards the poor guy. I flagged down cars and then went back to the poor man who was still not moving. The bike was on top of him exhaust on his leg. I pulled the bike off of him and was told by a car driver to leave him. The poor man started to come around and looked very confused. He tried to sit up but was pulled back to a lying position by the car driver. His head was lower than his body and blood was gushing from his head. It was now that I wished I had done that first aid course I had promised myself I would do before I left. Someone called an Ambulance and then with that the injured man got up and managed to get on his moped. No one stopped him and with blood gushing from his head and arm he rode off. I think when his senses came back either he couldn’t afford to go to hospital or maybe the police would be a problem as he was pissed.

We have now made in to the wine growing area of Argentina and the landscape yesterday was like riding through a slice of Mars red mountains and dusty hills leading down to lots of vineyards. Camped in an amazing campsite and decided to have a day off in the sun.

20th December

God don’t you just hate computers sometimes. I had just spent an hour typing the update for this page and the computer quit! Bugger.

28th December 2007

Hope everyone had a nice Christmas. We are now in Oz and heading for Sydney in a rented van. Our bikes have been delayed in Argentina and after a week of trying to organize them to arrive at the same time as us finally I am afraid that the Christmas holidays won and we ended up in Sydney with no wheels. The bikes should now arrive on 5th January all being well and I really hope they do.

We flew to Melbourne and had a lovely Christmas with Jude Tosh and their family a big thanks to Sara and Colin for making a special ozzy Christmas for the bikeless bikers.

We have now hired a small van and borrowed some pillows for a bed and we are now driving back to Sydney for New Year. Australia is a real culture shock after South America. Driving on the right side of the road and roads actually mean that they have tarmac on them. Have seen lots of bikes on the road and cant wait to join them the sun is out the roads are lovely and we are in a van, but we are still happy.

2nd January 2008

First of all a Happy New Year to anyone reading this. We are still in the hire van and we have now updated our li-los to second hand mattresses so we have a bit more comfort while we wait for our bikes to come. It starting to get to both of us now and we are finding Australia really expensive.

On a good note we met up with Julia and Phil who are on their honeymoon and had a wonderful new year managed to be outside the opera house to watch the fireworks over Sydney harbour bridge what an amazing sight so cool to be with friends and see that.

5th January

Well we are still in a van and it has been 2 weeks. We are getting quite used to finding free car parks to sleep in. We have become a couple of gypsy’s but life isn’t so bad. Sometimes you just have to accept and enjoy where you are. It has been great having a van and we have driven about 2000 kms having a look around the South East coast. Have not seen a kangaroo yet but have seen possums cockatoos and pelicans. The coast is really amazing sandy white beaches and a lovely blue sea. The bikes better turn up soon before we go soft.

Our bikes are still delayed and have not left Argentina yet nothing is ever easy is it especially when you are relying on other people. Phoned Dakar Motos today and was told that they will try their up most to get them here next week. Thing is the longer they take the less time we have here we still have to get them through customs,

So no bikey news this end but I have just heard the Dakar is cancelled for the first time in 30 years. What a nightmare. I bet there are a few gutted riders there.

14th January

Well we haven’t been on our bikes for nearly a month and I beginning to wonder if I can still ride a bike. We are now about 200 kms from Sydney at Newcastle. We have had quite an expensive time here but we have lived as cheaply as we could with no camping equipment and stove as that was left with the bikes. Our van road trip has been kind of fun and life seems to revolve around finding a shower (nearly always cold) but although we are proper gypsies we don’t smell too bad. The other pastime has been looking for Wi-fi with my lap top as internet cafés seem to be far and few between and when you find one they are $2.50 for 15 minutes. We look very dodgy sitting outside people’s houses. If you are in Oz at the moment reading this and you see a Ute Hire van outside your house, don’t panic we haven’t got guns we are just stealing your modem signals.

17th January

The Shipping Disaster

After a month of living in the back of a hire van and biding time waiting for the bikes to turn up, disappointment after disappointment. A beautiful. View or an amazing beach would be spoilt by the thought in the back of our minds of our trip slowly going down the toilet. When we left Argentina we were promised that the bikes would be with by the 28th December, latest. That came and went then we were then told 5th January no problem. That date also came and with lots of frantic e-mails and expensive phone calls to Buenos Aires were told that we may have to pay more money to get the bikes here. The quote we had was £1250 per bike by air to save time. We were then asked to pay another £300 per bike. “Ok” we will pay it we had no choice. “If we pay this will our bikes be on a flight?” “Yes no problem” I should know better than to listen to that phrase. As soon as someone says that it usually means “Big problem” and true to form there was a big problem.

On 11th January I received this e-mail from Silver Freight:

...........

Dear Louise Sara Hillier & Gary Jonathan Prisk

I so sorry of all the time that the motos are delaid, the problem was, that the aircompany doen t give space to load it on any fly and not all the aircompany can load Dangerous Goods, and the company how have the space are to much expensive.

Well the motos will be flying next Wednesday (16/01/08) on Lan Chile to take the next fly with Quantas to Sydney. I will send all the details of the cargo next Monday, by the way, this is important: to make the guia we need some adress to localizate you or some friend how is living on Australia, the aircompany need that details.

 

Thank you very much and best regards

...........

Great we have a date! I then asked to have an airway bill number and the flight details, this was promised for the next day. The next day came and no e-mail. It was the 15th January and still no confirmation and airline number. I then got this e-mail from Silver Freight:

..........

Dear Louise and Gary,

Sandra Toll me that you were finish your journal on Australia, and may be

you need to send the Motos to Singapore, it is better to all to send the

Motos to Singapore, please we need to know then you will be arrived to

Singapore, to evaluate that it is better to send there. Because if I send

the motors to Sydney Tomorrow, they are arriving to Sydney on 7 days. That

is the why we need that information.

Thank

........

What ??? We had agreed to the 7 days and agreed to pay more money and we had tried our best not to loose our tempers but what was going on now?

I phoned Sandra who has tried her very best to sort the nightmare out but she was getting lied to too. “Are the bikes leaving? Have we got a flight number?”

“I don’t know.” She was very distressed with the situation and offered to give us our money back that we paid for her services. “No we don’t want a refund we just want our bikes.” The next day we got up really earlier drove round the streets looking for Wi-Fi. I checked my e-mail. Nothing no e-mails from the freight company or Sandra. I don’t like this, I don’t think the bikes went. Another call and our fears were confirmed. The bikes didn’t leave and were not likely to leave in the next few days. I think we were just fed a load bullshit from Silver Freight so we didn’t give them any hassle.

It turned out that Silver Freight had given us a quote for the bikes that was too low and instead of admitting they had screwed up they had spent a month trying to get the bikes to Australia for their quote and they had fed us lies to keep us quiet. The bikes were never booked on any plane and the dates he gave were I think just plucked from the air. But each date he gave changed our direction we drove in the van and we hovered with in a 2 days driving distance of Sydney. What a complete disaster!

“The trips over.” Gary said in a depressed tone.

All the planning, saving, re-mortgaging of my home was all just to drive around Australia in a Hire van. Great. Not the motorcycle tour we were planning.

The Options Now....

After lots of tears here are our options:

Send the bikes home, something neither of us want to do.

Send the bikes to Singapore and carry on from there and try and make the best of the time we have left in Australia.

We got Sandra to get us some quotes for Singapore air and sea. The air quote came in at £2000 per bike we both gulped, that’s not an option, as we would run out of money. The sea quote came in at £500 per bike but would take a month to get there. Decided to go for the sea option and the bikes are now leaving on the 25th January. So a month to kill before Singapore.

We took the hire van back and got a ‘rent a bomb’ car. It is a 6 cylinder 4 litre Ford Falcon and what a piece of shit it is too. The tailgate does not lock so we have to back it up close to trees or walls. It chugs and wallows along smoke belching out while the engine sucks the fuel like booze to a lush. But it’s cheap and we are still mobile. Both of us feeling like scum we booked into a motel for a couple of nights the first time in a proper bed in a month. Gary has hurt his back I think the second hand mattresses have not helped. While driving on the way to the motel Gary spotted a Thai massage place. In pain he decided to give it a go. As we parked the jalopy pissed water all over the road. I don’t think you have heard the last of our new wagon full of character I think it will have a few stories in the week that we have it. I waited in the car while Gary waddled across the road like an oap who had shat himself. He returned half an hour later not looking happy at all. I was expected smiles and a relaxed look but a pained scowl. “That was horrible” he said trying to get in the car. “I said that my back is out and hurts so please be gentle and the bitch jumped on my back I told her it hurts and she just carried on the worst $35 I have ever spent.” Oh dear.

Yet another plan is hatching

Now we know we are not going to see our bikes in Oz and I guess our mission to ride our own bikes is now over. But we can still ride round the world we just have to get a couple of bikes to do it on. At a local bike shop we saw two-second hand 1994 250 Kawasaki road bikes that were the cheapest bikes they had. At home would be about £500 but here bikes are expensive and they were £1100 each. But we could sell them in Perth before we fly to Singapore.

I have also contacted a few Australian Motorcycle magazines to see if they knew of anyone that would be interested in our story and that might lend us two bikes. A long shot but might work.

So that’s it for now, no one said it would be easy.

25th January

NEW PLANS

Ok the bikes are now on a boat to Singapore and will be there on the 25th February. We have been in the Balmain Lodge motel for a week and found a great pub down the road which when you walk in you feel welcome. Australian pubs are very different from home and all seem to have big screens with dog racing or the trots on big screens, people standing round drinking schooners of beer and then going to a machine on the bar to cash their winnings. The Riverside has no betting, lots of wood and live music, so we decided to stay here and try to and get the next bit of our trip sorted out. It has been great to stay in one place and try and get a bit positive.

Over the last week we have bought countless magazines, trawled websites until our eyes were on stalks and been to nearly every bike shop in Sydney. We found an old XT 600 kicker, lovely mint green and purple. We bought this one from a South African guy for about £1000 and then went shopping for helmets, jackets, gloves as all our gear is with the Dommies. Gary has now got a 80s throwback helmet with yellow and purple graphics on it, leather gauntlets gloves with studs in them and some £2 jeans from a charity shop. I have got some dragon jeans and a £50 helmet (not as recto as Gary) The next mission was to get the bike registered which turned out to be lots more hurdles to jump. No address and no proof of id in Oz. We thought at one point that we would not be able to register it but Julia’s uncle Chris came to the rescue. He is Sgt. Major in a Sydney school and he signed a form as referee for us, Thanks Chris you are a star. My bike was proving more of a problem Gary had been a bit lucky with his and had bought it at a price that was affordable. They’re seemed to be nothing else around and only a TT250 100 miles away from Sydney and was £1500. I had come to terms with the fact I might be doing 4500 kms on a 250 and really felt we had no choice but really wasn’t looking forward to it. Gary while out and about on his 3rd visit to the RTA (no it doesn’t mean road traffic accident, it’s the roads and traffic authority) spotted a little bike garage, went in to see if he had any bikes for sale. “No” was the answer but as Gary was leaving said “Hang on mate, might know of someone selling their Xt, I will give him a call.” An hour later we were shaking hands on a blue electric start XT600.

Both our bikes are old ladies, rusty and not looking their best but we are now mobile. It felt so good to be on two wheels again as we went over Sydney bridge I could feel my face changing from the stressed all is lost look to a big smile. The air rushing past my face, my knees in the wind again and yes, control over our trip again.

We have got quite a lot of stuff that we can’t carry on the bikes so we are sending it on to Perth and we are going to try and go as light as possible. We have a month now to ride to Perth and fly to Singapore. We leave on Wednesday. Perth here we come.

28th January

Off tomorrow

The last few days we have been really good. We have been trying the best we can to get the new old bikes sorted for their 4500 kms trek. My bike has been a bit of a pain in the arse. The handlebars were bent, so replaced them outside a friendly bike breakers. We then had a few rides about town and it just still wasn’t riding right. It was really weird it kept pulling to the right on the front. I knew there was something wrong but couldn’t quite figure out what. Gary has had the front end apart 3 times. First we thought, shit the folks are bent, as one would work better than the other. Not bent, we then thought maybe it the folk oil poured that out, it looked like something out of shrek’s swamp we thought that might be the problem and after jumping up and down on the folks they seemed to work better So another ride better but still not right. It was really weird as it wasn’t all the time but a pig to ride.

We got invited to dinner with Fi from Australian Trailrider magazine and rode to her house. What a great chick, we had a lovely dinner. She races Super Moto and also trail rides. We stayed the night at her house and the next day she dug around her garage for bits and pieces to help us with our trip. Gary went out on my bike again to try and figure out what was wrong with it. “It’s the head bearings.” We new they were a bit worn but didn’t think they were that bad as the bike had only been serviced a week ago. Bugger! It was Australian day and nothing was open. Fi got her parts list out and then went into her garage came back with a big smile, “hey guys here you go.” and handed us head bearings for my bike. What’s the chances of that going to some ones house for dinner and they happen to have the exact bearing for your bike. Fi let us use her garage and then yet again my bike was dismantled. Two hours later banging and crashing the bike had new head bearings and was like new (ish).

The bikes now named Cybil and Bazil are as ready as they will ever be. Fi stickered our bikes up with “Australian Trailrider Magazine” decals so they now have a little bit of street cred. Mine only has Rego till Feb 14th (same as an MOT) so we have to be in Western Australia before that runs out, Christ so many deadlines. We have also just been lent a fuel cell to carry more fuel for the long stretches. Beats a can that we usually use just hope we don’t need it too much.

Off tomorrow early and I am really excited. Yes riding in Oz.

5th February

YEA-HA We have now got half way round the world have ridden 11,000 kms (though not all on our Dommies) Cybil and Bazil are holding up good we do miss the Dommies though. The XTs are really vibey. We have spent years customising the Dommies to what we want. Big aluminium panniers, Screens, Gel touring seats. We now have a bag strapped to the back and some £10 throw overs and everything held on with bungles and standard torture seats. But all that said we are both really happy to be on the move again.

We have ridden! 600 kms from Sydney to Adelaide and now have another 3000 kms to ride to get to Perth.

When we got to Adelaide we had a great welcome from Ben and Gill who invited us to stay. Ben works for AustralianTrailRider Magazine and we need to say yet another Big Big Thank you for inviting some dirty Poms to come and stay.

6th February

Only a quick one as we have got to get a few more miles in today. We are now in Streaky Bay and have now covered about 2000kms on the Xts. Grays bike went round the clock today so he now has a new bike.

Getting used to my bike now and am almost bonding with it, well my arse certainly is. Bum is a bit sore. Back on the now road.... Tally Hoe

6th February

Right have a bit more time now as we have got a motel room for the night the first one since we have been on the road. We left Sydney on the 30th and it was a lovely feeling to be on the road on two wheels again. We had made a few friends in the local bar and when we said goodbye everyone seemed to have an opinion the Nullarbor seemed be something of a legend. How will you get petrol? Do you know how big our Country is? Do you know what you are doing? In all everyone seemed to know all about traveling on a motorcycles but most had never done it themselves. The scare mungers were out in force. And I am not saying that we ignored them but if you listen to hard to what people say I don’t think you would step outside your door for fear of being run over by a bus or attacked by rabid flying fish. The first day we didn’t do that many miles but had a bit of fun with the bikes. Gary had read in one of the many magazines that he had been reading about that there was a trail beside a railway track.

We found the trail and didn’t really prepare for it being technical but as we got further down the track it got narrower and rougher up and down mounds then an uphill with lots of loose gravel. Gary flew up it but I didn’t, in the usual ungraceful style that I have mastered over the years, laid the XT down. We didn’t even let the tyres down and it lost grip. Nothing broken we thought of all the miles we had to do and we really couldn’t afford to break anything. The trail had turned into to deep gullies and I think if I was on my Serow I don’t think there would have been a problem. We turned back and as I went down the hill I had fallen off I went through a massive spiders web. Gary thought I had lost control of the bike again but I was just freaking out at thought of all the ozzy spiders that can hurt you and mowing ones house down I think was cause for attack mode. No spider in my helmet we carried on. Further on we then found a gravel road and thought we would have a go at that. It was amazing scenery the smell of eucalyptus and a hot dusty trail. It was what our bikes were made for. I was really enjoying it but him upstairs had other ideas. We noticed the sky was looking really black and then big old drops starting to hit us a crack of thunder and yet again we turned back for the tarmac.

We managed to out run the storm and by the time it caught up with us we had already set up our tent.

The last week has been great we have met some incredible people when you get out in to the country the people seems to change. They become a lot friendlier, we have heard so many stories. Life seems really hard. In one town we stayed the locals said that they haven’t produced any crops for seven years because of drought.

The opinions on our trip didn’t change though and the “Do you know how big our country is?” and “You have got a long way to go.” seemed to be on the tip of every ones tongue. Well we are now half way to Perth and another few long days in the saddle. My bum feels like it has been tenderized and I have got red marks where I sit. Its worth though. The open space and the long empty roads though sometimes boring gives you time to think and appreciate where you are.

Thanks again to everyone who has written to us we read all the messages and it is great to here from you all.

8th Feb

Made it across the Nullarbor and my arse feels like it has been on a butcher’s block and given a damn good beating. I can safely say that it is now more than tender. I have also got a bit of whiplash too as one road trains went past and the wind it created caught my helmet owww. Apart from that we are both fine, no major hassles. We came through the end of the Nullarbor though, as we got into the first town we had seen in days, Gary’s bike started to burp and fart. We thought we might have a celebration with a few beers and a pat on the back, but as soon as we got in the campground Gary had the tools out while I put the tent up. A new spark plug and another ride up the road, it was worse and it backfired and blew a flame out of the exhaust. Shit. We have still a 1000 kms to ride you can’t give up on us now. The tank removed and bits everywhere in a sandy ant infested campground he found that the wire to the coil was a bit iffy a squeeze with a leatherman and hoped for the best, by the time it was done it was dark and the campground asleep so we had a worried night thinking of what to do if the bike was buggered. Gary got straight on the bike in the morning and it didn’t make a wrong note, no miss fires.

A big thumbs up and smiles and back on the road. We are now in Esperance on the coast and have stopped early today as we stink and we have no clean socks. Dirty pikeys!

13th February

Well it took us 12 days in all to cross the Nullarbor and what a ride, we did the most miles we have ever done per day on any of the trips we have done. There was just nothing to stop for and a never-ending tree less road. I got a little bored one day and decided to count the dead kangaroos. In a 50 kms stretch I counted 86 in various states of decay. One morning we were met by very fresh road kills the road trains just plough in to the roos and my god it was disgusting. We were dodging in and out of red fresh Gary saw the furry foot, I just saw big chunks of flesh which I tried my best not to run over. Yuk.

We also saw emus; Gary had an urge to chase them. So he sped off into the bush after them. Emus are bloody fast and it wasn’t long before they were far away. I had a dice of my own with local wildlife and got bitten by a bull ant. My leg swelled up and it looked like an egg attached to my leg. I was really worried so we called into a local hospital. “When did yah get bit?” A nurse said as I dropped my trousers “last night.” I said very concerned. “More than 24 hours, well if ain't killed you yet then you will be ok, probably a bull ant, they can give you quite a nip.” “Nip the bloody thing has made me deformed” I got given some pills and cream and I can safely say my leg is back to normal. The critters here really scare me I was in the shower yesterday and I am surprised how calm I was when in the corner of the cubicle there was what looked like a snake. I gathered my things up walked back to the tent. It took half an hour or so before I mentioned it to Gary in passing. “Oh yeah, there was a snake in the shower earlier.” “What you took all this time to tell me that, I think you better tell someone.” I went and told the cleaner and she went in armed with a blue rubber glove. It turned out to be a legless lizard and although small tried to bite through the glove.

14th February

We are still in Bunbury and heading for Perth tomorrow. We have managed to get the bikes on the internet and in a local paper to sell. I am going to be quite sad to see Basil go. It has been so reliable and although not the best seat has been a bloody good bike. I did have visions of freighting him home but I think if we did that we wouldn’t have much money left to get us home plus I think my Dommie would get jealous. We now have 11 days to get the bikes sold and us to Singapore. I am so looking forward to the next bit but quite a lot to organize.

14th February Update

After three weeks with no information on our Dommies. We had a bill of Loading and that was about it. We were told they would be arriving in Singapore on the 25th February... I got a bit worried, as I haven’t heard anything after lots of bouncing emails and ones with no answer I have spent today in a hot room with my laptop trying to get information. It turns out that yes the ship exists (thank god for that) after our shipping disaster I was beginning to think that our bikes had been swallowed up into a big Spanish speaking dirty hole. I then found a website with the schedule for the boat. It gets in on the 20th. SHIT. Well good, it’s early, but shit, we are not there! I feel like a jockey trying to get on a run away horse. So here’s where the count down begins. We have to sell the XTS, any takers? Send all the extra stuff we bought home. Get on a plane and get to Singapore in 6 days. This should be fun.

19th February

Ok we are still in Oz. We are now staying with Lance a great guy who for his sins has let us stay. What a great place, great company and a proper bed. But what the hell are you still doing there? Your bikes are waiting in Singapore, yes the boat has docked with our crates and we can’t sell the Xts. Friggin nightmare. We have advertised the bikes taken them round to various dealers? Had people round to look at them. One guy said £2000 for the two. Ok we thought he then brought a mate round and they took them up the road. “Not much go ah?” Much go, what’s he on about it’s a trail bike not a Hyabusa. Next guy comes round decides he wants my bike and says ok £1200. “I’ll just go to the ATM and get you a deposit out ”he didn’t come back he called and said that he had another bike to look at and he thinks he will do that. I called a training school thinking that someone might have passed his or her test and want a bike. He calls me back and says he is interested so Gary and I ride through Perth. He is the boss of the training company tries my bike out wearing saddles and then brags to his mate that he tried to wheelie and then offers me £750. tosser. We then had another guy come round in ambulance (he’s the driver) He takes both bikes for a spin down the road and now has asked us to take the bikes to a Yamaha dealer to have them checked over. The Yamaha dealer said on the phone that he has a 1996 XT for sale and that is up for £2000 and then in the same breath says that mine is only worth a grand. “What my bike is only 3 years younger so how come it is half the amount of his” Bloody hell I feel like stressed Eric! We have also priced up sending the XTs home the price isn’t too bad and we can get on with the trip.

Back to the trip and we have booked or so we thought our boat to India with the Dommies with us.

Here are the e-mails so far:

“The Tiger Breeze sails from Singapore on the 20th February and the 5th March

For Chennai India.......The bikes, however, you will have to arrange locally in Singapore. Attached is a list of the Bengal Tiger Lines shipping agents contact them regarding shipping the bikes.”

Did that and here was the first reply

“Thanks yours below, unfortunately we are operating as a liner feeder and we do not have self owned container for your LCL (loose cargo). Please contact.....”

Next

“Dear Louise & Gary,

 

Please note BTL is strictly a Shippers Owned Container (SOC) feeder operator and therefore does not accept cargoes as per your description, but we have however no objection if the owners accept the 2 x Motorcycles as part of the passengers’ belongings (eg. baggages), as long as: -

 

aa. The loading & discharging of these 2 crates can be carried out via the vessel’s provision crane, without interfering with the cargo operations.

bb. All necessary documents for landing of these 2 crates/motorbikes at Chennai are obtained accordingly.”

 

Ok Cool, got a boat and we just have to sort the paperwork out (India is renowned for how easy paperwork is, Not. Oh and try and operate a ships crane to get the bikes on and off.

Just got this one through from the captain:

“Dear all,

Pls note wrt the passenger there has been issue recently with the immigration dept as they insist that vessel agents give a letter stating that agents are responsible for the passengers until they leave India. Unfortunately we are unable to do so unless it can be a back to back guarantee for which Owners will have to first give a guarantee/ under to us a agents before we accept the same.

 

Wrt the motorcycle the process of documentation at customs is tedious and it may be very difficult to clear it through customs.

The passengers/ Owners will need to employ a Agents to manifest the parcel and clear the customs (BTL Maa are no in a posn to carry out the same).

 

Warm regards

Capt Sri”

 

Well that is it for today folks will try again tomorrow. Keep you posted. This trip is like a roller coaster at Flambards, enjoy it when you are going but when you stop you wonder why you ever got on in the first place.

“I want to ride my bicycle, I want to ride my bike, I want to ride my bicycle, I want to ride it wear I like” Queen.

25th February

NEWS FLASH WE HAVE GOT THE DOMMIES BACK, Yee Haa

The last few days have been a complete crack up. So so many ups and downs but when we look back, over all, a big smile factor. We stayed with Lance in Fremantle for a week in an amazing house. Eventually sold Basil to Allan the ambulance man and I was a little sad to see him go, bought our tickets to Singapore. Then had a day to sell Cybil and the clock was ticking. While staying with Lance he went out and bought a Silver 25-year-old Rolls Royce. (What’s that got to do with selling Cybil) Well it goes something like this...

Saturday morning Lance offers to take us to the Swan Valley wine region. While on the way had a call about Cybil and he offers us $1000 after long discussions decided to take the cash and arranged to meet the guy at 7pm. Had a great lunch, wine testing and felt like the queen in this amazing car. Then on the way back had another call. This guy was stood looking at Cybil and was really interested. Now it was 6.30 one guy was on the way to give us a $1000. We came round the corner we got out of the car “Thank you driver.” Gary said to Lance, funny as hell. It was then auction time for Cybil. I couldn’t bare it and got the hell out of there. Gary eventually got $1400 of the bike. A quickly packed our stuff and then Lance drops us to the airport through Perth with the silver lady glinting in the city lights, mad.

Our flight was at 3am and pretty much didn’t get any sleep so when we got to a cheap Singapore hotel we both just flopped.

Monday was a really exciting day for us and we got to grips with the Singapore train system (which beats the underground hands down, so clean, air conditioned and video screens in the tunnels) and found our way to the warehouse. We seemed to walk miles through a maze of folk lift trucks, containers and pallets. Up some steps and then into a massive warehouse full of wooden boxes and busy people. We felt we shouldn’t be there with out seeing someone first but then Gary spotted our bikes. The crates wrapped in plastic and Elmo poking out from my bike. YES! Our faces both lit up and we shook the hand of some random worker (why we did that, who knows, we were just so pleased and felt we had to thank someone, even if he didn’t know why he was being thanked) There was a tabby cat curled up on top of my bike inside the crate, my dommie had now become the local cat coach, not for long I hoped. There was times we didn’t think we would see our bikes again. So now we just to get them out of there. We went upstairs to the office and were then told that we had to go to the head office in the city to pay and fill out some forms. Got in a taxi and into the land of high risers. Another cock up by Argentina and we were told that that we had to get the stamp from the company that were the consignee (supposed to be us). I had used the address of a printer I work with (as you always need an address when shipping) and some how the freight firm in Argentina had put them to take delivery of the bikes. Now we needed their permission to release the bikes. Hmmm, great to the end, South American bollocks, they couldn’t organize a piss up in a brewery. Yet another hurdle for us to leap over. I was really lucky as Keith the guy I deal with in England for my printing was over visiting the Singapore plant and had said that we should catch up. I gave him a call and then caught another train to meet him. We had a look around the printing plant which was unreal to see and got our forms stamped. Keith invited us for drinks at his hotel. Couldn’t believe it a high-rise hotel in the executive looking over the city, drinking wine. Ah yes we are roughing it. The next day we went back to the warehouse there was now two cats in the crate with my bike. Some feline eviction was in order before they started some cat sex games and had some badass biker kittens.

It took all morning to free the Dommies from there wooden prison and then a quick check through customs and we were spat out onto the busy Singapore roads. Bit of a culture shock from Oz. So many cars, very slow in hot muggy weather. My bike wasn’t running very well and would cut out at quarter throttle. Was a bit scary at an orange light thinking I could make it across and then going for acceleration and the bike nearly stops in the middle of a junction, shit, my heart beat a little faster but the good old Dommie got back to the hotel and in need of some TLC.

4th March

Yeah baby yeah, we are back on the road again.

Singapore was an amazing place it is such a small country only 37 miles across (approx). Lots and lots of high risers a techno feel to it with a seedy edge. We met some great people Gary spent a lot of his time down servicing the bikes while I did my nails (yeah right). We got friendly with the local bike shop, which just happened to be behind the hotel and also Baha a local guy into every kind of dirt biking possible. Don’t know where they find space here for enduros but apparently they do. After two days the bikes were ready for the off again. New oil, clean air filters and a friendly reassuring pat. Friday we left. Baha met in the morning, as he wanted to lead us to the border. His mum even made us sandwiches, which were bloody lovely. The border crossing was a doddle though the Malaysian side was a bit weird no one looking that official and we had to do a u turn on the high way to try and get someone to stamp our Carnet. Very odd but also very friendly. Welcome to Malaysia. When we were trying to organize the trip this was the one place that I really didn’t give that much attention to, I don’t know why it just slipped through the planning net. Just a name I really didn’t know what to expect. As we came into the first town and in fact all the roads leading into the town, there were flags everywhere. Blue, white green and yellow all fluttering in the wind. It is elections time on this hazy hot day, the sort of day that makes you squint at everything with the fluttering flags, bad Malaysian driving (they tail gate you really bad), monkeys on the side of the road, it made for an interesting ride. Traffic lights were really funny on the major ones there was a digital count down. There doesn’t seem to be many big bikes here, mainly step throughs with “turbo” or “twin clutch” stickers on them. They all line up revving their underpowered engines, taking the traffic light race very seriously and then there off belching out two stroke fumes and thinking there in a GP. Our bikes stood out a lot causing many a stare or a wave. In one petrol station a guy even tried to do a wheelie for us. (Managed an inch from the ground). The moped seems to be the main family transport; I counted 5 on one bike, madness.

It was getting kind of late when we pulled into the beach resort and this turned out to be our home for two days. We woke up in the middle of the night to the most horrendous storm and it didn’t stop for the whole of the next day, which happened to be my birthday. I was really worried, as a guy we spoke to the night before reckoned that the seasons had changed they had not had there usual monsoon season that was usually November, December and January and now it was raining real monsoon stuff, Christ, just our luck but all the way round people had been saying how the weather patterns had changed in there country. Suppose that’s global warming for you. So nothing for it but a few beers in town.

We have now covered 16000 kms though not on our bikes all the way, which leads me into the next Loo and Gary shipping nightmare. We tried really hard to sort out getting the Dommies into India and I am afraid to say we failed on that mission. It seems that the Indian authorities are a not easy to deal with and the best way in is to ride in from Nepal something we don’t have time to do. So hatched plan number 42G We are now sending the Dommies to Greece and riding home from there on them and we are going to get bikes in India to complete our mission.

21st March

Happy Easter to everyone and sorry that the diary has not been updated for a while. It has been a busy old time and a lot of traveling and organizing. We are now in Goa in India and have met up with Lisa and Matt (Gary’s kids) and are now staying in a hotel on a bit of a holiday.

We crossed Malaysia on the Dommies, what an amazing ride. It really is motorcycle heaven. Twisty smooth tarmac through palm trees and hills. The people so, so friendly. Everywhere we stopped some one wanted to know about the bikes and what we thought of their country. We rode east to west coast and took 3 days staying in some really cheap but plush hotels. Malaysia is made up of 4 main religions Chinese, Malay, Muslim and Indian. It is really weird to being going down the road and seeing so many different temples.

As we came into different towns the traffic got heavy and the step through bikes a plenty they buzzed in and out of the cars and scared the crap out of me, they take so many risks. On one bridge a guy came flying past me, head down near the handlebars for more speed. A truck on one side of the road and coach coming the other way. The guy on the moped just aimed for the gap in the middle. He must have shat him self, I did just watching.

We got stopped by the police for not going in the right lane as they have lanes beside the highway (a bit like our cycle paths at home) just for motorcycles. The thing is, the bikes they ride are not much bigger that a push bikes and our bikes with the luggage took up nearly all the lane. So we figured that we would stay with the cars. We got flagged down by the police (as well as lots of mopeds) and given a ticking off and told to pay £50 each. We groveled and said we wouldn’t do it again and said that if he fines us Malaysia would be the only country that had in the whole of our world trip. The policeman asked to see our passports and then said that we could go. But “shhhhhh” We hoped back on the bikes got in the right lane and headed for Panang. What a great place we thought it would be full of tourists but in fact it wasn’t too bad. We found a cheap guesthouse, which had a bar beside a beach and stayed there for a few days.

The trip plans....

We wanted to ride to Thailand and send the bikes to Europe from Bangkok we had started the arrangements with the shippers and all was looking feasible. We just had to ride 1000kms a border crossing crate the bikes and then we fly to India. On my birthday Gary had been swimming in the sea and the last few days his ear had been really sore with the helmet. It hadn’t gone away, so we went to see a doctor. He washed Gary’s ear out by pumping a syringe with warm water and then catching what ever came out in a bowl. Nice, glad I wasn’t watching as apparently it looked like fresh pineapple juice with bits in. He had an ear infection and so had to take eardrops and antibiotics. Its hard when you are on the road and have to be somewhere by a certain time, things seem to go against you. Gary couldn’t ride with such a bad ear and so we had to change our plans yet again. We sat looking over the most amazing sea view sipping beer trying to decide what to do. There was a friendly barman, he was a bit annoying as he was really loud and seemed to know everything about everything but in this case he was quite useful.

“So where do you go next?” the waiter asked.

Our story poured out “we need to send our bikes to Europe and we were going to send them from Bangkok but Gary now cant ride for a few days and we have to be in India by the 15th March”

“I used to work in the docks in Penang for 3 years, they have boats bound for Europe. Get the ferry to the mainland in Georgetown and then ask a taxi driver to take to you the docks, there are lots of freight forwarders there”

We didn’t even know there was a dock so to find out that we may be able to send the bikes from there made a shit load of sense and Gary could get better before we flew. The next day we caught a taxi down town and a friendly taxi driver again asked our story. We told him about how we needed a shipper to send our motorcycles, he got on the phone and with in five minutes he handed the phone over to Gary. It was a friend of his wife’s cousin or something and he was a shipping agent. By that afternoon we had a quote on the e-mail and we started making the arrangements. Who needs to do research on the Internet all you need to do is go to a bar and then catch a cab. We moved hotels to be closer to town and stayed in a very cheap clean guesthouse. Gary then got an eye infection and then both of us got ill with fevers. We thought at one point we had dengue fever. Gary was worse than me he just poured with sweat and was so weak. Another visit to a doctor and more pills and a blood test. “Come back on Friday and we will give you a test to see if you have dengue fever”

Shit, when someone says you have an illness and gives it a dodgy name I think you feel worse.

We tried to book our flights on the Internet and had a nightmare with it. It seems that in Malaysia you have to have paper tickets. We bough our tickets in a travel agents and just hoped Gary’s results would be ok.

Another shipping

The Dommies had spent more time on ship than on the road. Gary felt a little better and we rode to the crate makers. We were going to put the bikes in there own crates but it turned out in the end to be cheaper to put them in there own container. Really strange to put our two bikes in a massive 20 foot container. They were wrapped in what looked like cling film and fork lifted into the container, which was on the back of a waiting lorry. We got a lift with the lorry driver to the port so we could get the bikes through customs. This was another fun experience. The lorry driver was called Wan and was Indian. “Do you like Indian food” he asked. “Yes nice we both said though neither of us were in the mood for a curry. “We have to wait to take the bikes to the port so I thought we could go to my temple” “Ok” we said, its not everyday you go to an Indian temple for lunch. We pulled up outside the temple and he left the lorry running. We were met at the door of the temple by all of his family “This wife, this mother these my children”. We took our shoes off at the door and followed the colourfully dressed family through the temple. We waited in a queue in like a canteen area. Gary and I felt really out of place but very welcome. We got shown to some seats and a big banana leaf placed in front of us then guys with big pots of rice and curry ladled there wares onto our leaves. We had to eat with our hand (the right one) my Christ, what a mess. Gary and I by the end of it might as well have just dunked our heads straight in it. Really nice though and what an experience. Lunch finished we drove to the port. A few hours later and our bikes container were flying through the air and on its way to Greece. What a relief.

The next day we went back to the doctors and was told that there were no doctors on a Friday. Gary felt a bit better and so decided that as he was getting better day-by-day that it wasn’t Dengue. The next day we flew to India. It took us 21 hour to get to Goa and a night with out sleep. Even to get to the right bit of the airport seemed to be an expedition in itself. No signs, no seats and lots of different official looking people telling you the wrong things. We eventually found our way to the domestic flights bit of the airport and then had a 5-hour wait for Gary’s kids to get in. There were some seats that we took over with the luggage and us and were then told we couldn’t wait there. “Why, we asked.” 30 Rupees to sit. “But we are waiting for my children” Gary said. What flight are they on and we then had to tell him all the details of there flight. “Ok, you may sit” Well thanks mate didn’t realize seats were so precious and important.

Lisa and Muff’s flight came in and they seemed to be the last through the arrival gate. Gary was having kittens “they’ve missed it, something’s happened.” But all came good and all the planning and stress had paid off we got here on time. And had great hugs and smiles as a reward!

The next bit of the trip is going to be kind of weird we were hoping to buy bikes here and then sell them like we had done in Australia. Indian rules had changed recently and now the new ruling was that no one could buy a vehicle unless they were an Indian resident. This now has put a different slant on things. We sent our bikes onto Europe for fear that we would not get them through customs. Really glad we did, as India seems to be full of silly little rules, regulations and red tape even to get a sim card for your phone you have to give a passport photo and a copy of your passport. So the plan is now to rent two Enfield Gary has just gone to see if he can find the rental place. It would means that we wont be able to go up North as we first planned but I think there is plenty to see here. Will try and keep the website updated but the Internet cafes here are really slow.

2nd April

After two lovely weeks relaxing with Lisa and Mathew it was time to get back to the business of our trip. Goa had been wonderful and like taking a holiday with in a holiday if that makes sense. We made friends with a lot of the hotel staff and the local taxi drivers. Robert turned out to be more than just your average cabby. He seemed to know where to get anything you wanted, be it a trip to see dolphins or a random person who didn’t mind us borrowing their Royal Enfields for a few weeks. Our first plan was to buy two new Enfields, then Gary wanted to take one home, bigger than your average snowy scene glass dome but this plan turned out to be not possible in Goa. In the Enfield dealership in Panaji a grey haired salesman explained that we could not buy a bike in India and ride it here unless we put it in the name of a local Indian. We could however just send one home and he wouldn’t have a problem. Not helping our coast to coast plan though. We came back from the shop feeling a bit dejected. We had been hiring a Pulsar 150cc wizzy machine from Robert and we commented to him that we really wanted to ride Enfields. “No problem” he said “follow me” he wondered out of the hotel and into a neighbours house. Came out with some keys and uncovered the 350 Enfield Bullet. It looked like something my granddad used to ride. It’s looks were not helped by the fact that its owner had coated it in antirust treatment which although would stop it going rusty had made all the chrome look like it was decaying. Gary took it up the road “bop bop bop” he came back looking quite pleased with himself.

It was my turn for a test ride and my Christ what a learning curve gears on the wrong side, one up instead of one down. Reality crap drum brakes which I suppose could be aided with sticking your feet out in an emergency and then there was starting the thing I haven’t kicked a bike since I was 16 and that was only a 50 cc DT. A bit of different to this machine. I couldn’t start it so decided to just try and ride it. I went down the road and also came back with a smile. Peter the guy who owned the bike agreed to lend it to us and it would be £100 for the 16 days we needed it. Robert sourced another Enfield from one of his many contacts and we hired a rack for our luggage.

Gary’s kids left on the Sunday. It was really weird being back at the hotel with out them there, it made us both a bit home sick and sad. On this whole trip neither of us had been homesick mainly because we had been so busy planning the next leg. We packed, had a few too many beers and by Monday afternoon we were ready for the off. We had a rough route planned and Robert gave us various route tips. “Don’t ride at night and at the statue with the lone horseman take a left” or was that right. Anyway it didn’t seem to matter at the time we just wanted to get on the road again.

Our exit was more than embarrassing for me, lots of people watching, I climbed aboard and tried to start my steed. The bike was in gear and as I kicked I lost my balance. The bike tipped over and I had a red-faced moment of being helped to pick it up and someone else starting it for me. What a tit, these poor people were lending their bike to a girl for one thing and one that couldn’t even start the bike. As I rode off I wished the world would swallow me up and even now I cringe at the thought. Never mind. Coast to coast India here we come.

India is renowned for its bad roads, bad driving, and sheer volume of vehicles. I can’t count the amount of times I said F**ck, Sh*t or bloody hell in the first half an hour. My eyes on stalks, cars, trucks, tut tuts and bikes all flow along roads with no rules. Biggest wins and loudest horn also has a part to play in the pecking order on the road. Gary’s bikes had no mirrors and mine no horn. This place is mental. It’s too much for your brain to deal with cows, pigs, water buffalo’s, and oxen wonder beside a road with cracks, potholes and speed bumps like whoops.

What the hell have we done? And for our next trick ladies and gentleman we will now attempt to ride archaic motorcycles across a mad assault course called India.

The day went on and so did the road. Before we left we had said to Peter (the Enfields owner) that we would not ride the bikes at night the shadows were getting longer and the sun hung low in the dusty air. The potholes and the dirt road were not getting any better and it was making me feel a bit seasick. At one point Gary said that I actually got air on a decaying bridge, it was so bad the re bar was sticking out like a stinger. The ride was really hard work trying to avoid the bad bits. My bike bottomed out a few times and the folk seals had started to leak. I still wasn’t used to the back brake on the wrong side and I kept grabbing a handful of front brake. Gary had stopped to wait for me and just before him was a massive hole the width of the road. I tried to brake but again grabbed the front brake. I hit sand on the road and then fell off. “You ok?” Gary asked. Nothing hurt too much. I was now covered in red dust and the bike had a bent foot rest and back brake. We had no time to discuss me falling off we still had 50 kms to ride and we knew that we were going to be riding it in the dark. The light drew dim my lights on the Enfield like candles. There were still so many things on the road to avoid, trucks with no lights, oxen pulling carts, and traffic overtaking beeping and nearly heading you off what there was of tarmac. We came into a town and my senses had gone from red alert to brown alert, as they say in red dwarf. We pulled up outside an Internet café and the guy who worked there offered to show us to a hotel. He climbed on the back of Gary’s bike and I followed as close I could. Thank fuck. I was so, so glad to get off the bike and it took me a few hours to calm down. I had been gripping on so much both my thumbs had gone numb. I had a nice graze on my knee my ribs hurt I can safely say that was one of the hardest days of the whole trip.

8th April

We have now made it to Madras or Chennai as it is now called. We have had hell of a journey. It has been the hardest 1200 kms we have done yet. It is hard to put into words how you feel when riding here, there are so many thinks going on that you almost become part of a big scary fair ground ride. Colours, smells, people and then there is the road which has its own scary elements to it. Trucks that come straight towards you overtaking other trucks and the only thing you can do is aim for the dirt beside the road. When you do get a chance, which isn’t that often to take a breather from the chaos, there is always someone wanting to talk to you. “Which Country you came from? What is your name? And do you like India?” And then if you stay there too long “Are you married, how many children do you have?” followed by a head wobble and a smile. I got caught outside one hotel while Gary was looking at a room for the night and a crowd surrounded me all asking questions it was like being interrogated. Bra size didn’t come up but I am sure they were getting to it.

Riding the Royal Enfield has been like trying to nurturing two OAPs to do a Marathon. The good thing being that there is always a mechanics shop and they all know about Enfields. It gives you a chance to meet people and we have met a few, the list so far

Loo's bike

New back wheel bearing

New tyre (to be fair we should have fitted before we left)

Gear selector spring

New split link in chain (we would at home throw the chain away but not here, the chain lives on)

Fork adjustment

Clutch oil top up

Head gasket fixed in a 1 hour 10 minutes

Egg shaped wheel, which we didn’t fix but made the handle bars go up and down a bit like a merry go round

Front puncture, which coupled with the bent wheel, was so horrible

Gary’s bike

Folk seals

Tappets adjustment

Front break light switch

Gear sector adjustment before we left

Bits bent by Loo... Back break lever, footrest and front mud guard, opps.

And we have still to ride back to Goa.

15th April

The Enfield’s are now tucked up with their owners and the sight of the hotel after the two weeks in the mayhem was such a welcome sight. “Did you have a nice trip?” the hotel man behind the desk asked. Where do I start? So my reply was just a simple “yes, great, it was lovely to see the real India.

I am afraid to say that I lied, this had been the scariest experience of my life and I was so glad to have escaped the journey with only a few bruises.

Everyday we saw at least three carcasses of vehicles crashed, burnt or mangled. The driving is crazy and you can’t take your eye off the road for a second. I lost count of how many times I got driven off the road. One in particular I remember was a mini bus. It was in between two trucks I could only see the trucks and then he decided to overtake the truck. He could see me but just kept coming “You f**ckin toser wanker mother f**cker” I aimed for the side of the road The Enfield got air and then down the bank I just kept thinking “back brake, back brake,” and then managed to guide the bike back onto the road and tarmac. I got away with it. I was so angry I could have hit the guy spark out. This was really the final straw for me I really had had enough of being scared witless every five minutes, my nerves a jangle.

I will type up a more in-depth blog later as Gary has written his web bit and is now bored, so have to find the child some entertainment.

22nd April

Well yet another story and another shipping nightmare. Where to begin.... I don’t know whether it is our stupidity, or our luck but either way we arrived in Greece full of the joys of spring. Leaving India wasn’t hard, as we both had had enough of the dirt grime and mayhem of the place. I just wanted a Greek salad and some food with out a hand full of spices that hurt your bum hole on exit and our bikes so we could ride home. Home, as the plane came to land at Greece I had a little tear in my eye. “We are nearly there, we’ve nearly done it.” We hired a car and headed for a cheap hotel. In the morning I was awake and ready to tackle the shipping agents. It seemed to take so long for the clock to say nine o clock but didn’t want to ring to early and get some poor security guard.

The phone call.

“Hi may name is Louise Hillier and we have a container coming into Piraeus, Is it there, I have the reference numbers if you need them.”

“One moment please” was the answer. And I was then put on hold. Another lady came on the phone. “Your name please.”

“ Yes my name is Louise Hillier and we have two motorcycles coming in reference number.....”

“Yes, Yes you have two motorcycle and you want to ride them out of port, is this correct?”

“Yes, are the bikes there in port now?” I said almost jumping with glee.

“One moment please I will check.” The phone went dead for a minute and then she came back on the line.

“Your motorcycles have left mother ship and are in Port Side.”

“Wow excellent, they have left the mother ship and are on the portside. So can we collect them this afternoon? “

Gary’s face said it all, the blonde with no geography and not a good understanding of Greek pigeon English had led me to the complete wrong country. The bikes were in Egypt and they had unloaded our bikes there because there was port strikes in Greece and now they did not know when they would arrive.

I can’t believe this is happening to us again, all the feelings came back of the frustration and complete hopelessness of Australia. It was like a dentist drill as soon as you hear it you straightaway get tooth ache.

Bollocks. We had four very expensive days in Greece saw some great scenery and met some lovely people but it would have been so much better if we had had our bikes. This was just yet another problem that had to be solved and no amount of whining was going to change that. Lots of phone calls and a few days, we had a vague plan. Change port destination.... Italy.... Bikes arrive 29th PLEASE.

We are now on a ferry and are heading for Italy; Bikes should arrive Genoa 29th and have cost a lot more than any sane person would spend on shipping. The credit card is now taking a pounding. Cant wait to see everyone back home early May.

28th September 2007

We rode last night to Peter Henshaw’s house (Pod) After the most horrendous few days of trying to pack everything up. The campsite, my office, the flat, my horse and the goldfish.

We said so many farewells all of which made me cry. I can’t seem to say goodbye with out my eyes welling up. The worst goodbye was to my friend Vicky, what a star. She packed cleaned and kept us sane all the time while we were going into headless chicken mode. The packing of the bikes seemed to be a mammoth task in itself. There never seemed to be enough space. I had forgotten what we need and lost a grasp of what you can’t take with you. I guess the more you have the more luggage holds you back.

We had some food at Gary’s Mums with Lisa and Mathew (Gary’s kids) and Vicky. The conversation came around to the fact that we were both knackered and did we want to ride all that way tonight.

It was a cold night with a full moon crisp air and although both of us could have just curled up and slept we got on the road and again more good byes.

The four hours ride to Pod’s was really the first time we had ridden the bikes after all the work that Gary had done. My bike seemed to purr and it was like I had never left the saddle. A bit cold I tried my heated vest. Talk about luxury, toasty and cozy. I couldn’t get too comfy or my eyes would close. We arrived at 1am with a beer to greet us.

Journey to the first Ferry

Now I am not one to whinge normally but today was one of the hardest challenging rides I have ever done.

The morning was taken up with firstly Gary haven been given some riding trousers and the fact they cramped his bollocks. “Are these girls trousers?” There was no getting away from it Gary didn’t want to turn into a lady and his bollocks were something that were quite important to him. The trousers had to go. So with little time to spare we headed to the nearest bike shop. Gary all kitted up we headed to the shops for the things I had forgotten. I had even forgotten toothpaste amongst other things.

We knew we had wasted a bit of time in shops but we were not panicking.

Back on the road the day went from a fine day to pissing down. The rain was so hard it was coming inside my visor and flowing in little streams making it hard to see anything. We hadn’t set our autocoms up so we couldn’t talk to each other. Sense of humour gone we then hit the M25 “F**k” the traffic was terrible, choked right up. We filtered best we could through the traffic but big panniers and inconsiderate car drivers that wouldn’t move over, the going was slow. Gary rode beside me and pointed to his GPS and said there’s no way we are going to make it. I felt myself first of all start to well up and then I got angry. “Why the hell should these bloody cars stop us from getting our ferry?” We had paid £200 for a ticket and then I started to think not only of the money but what would we do if we missed the ferry? A long ride through Europe and another expensive ticket. Bugger that. I took lead and felt like a London courier weaving in out of the cars. On Straight bits I gave it beans where cars got in the way I revved my engine and caught the driver’s eye in their mirror. It was like the parting of a wave still raining we carried on to the A12. The traffic got better but I didn’t let up. I wanted to sleep in that cabin. A sign for Harwich gave me a sense of glee. Nearly there! Just keep swimming as Nemo says. We made it with 20 minutes to spare before the ferry left. Last on, we took what we needed off the bikes. “I can’t believe we made that.” I said to Gary “I didn’t think we had a hope in hell.”

We always seem to make things harder for ourselves, there never seems to be enough time. Or maybe we try to pack too much into our time. Either way it felt so good to be on that ferry.

24 hours later we docked in Denmark. Late getting out of the cabin we then had to re-pack the bikes. A big pile of stuff beside my bike. I looked at my panniers and wondered how it ever fitted. Why is that as soon as you take something out of a box it seems to get twice as big? A bit of pushing, tugging and shoving it all went back in, a bit like a loaded jack in the box.

We trundled off the ferry ramp “You the last ones?” A dockworker asked. “Yes” As usual but at least we made it.

Denmark seemed very flat and not very inspiring. I had discovered another problem on the ferry the space bar had gone wrong. It is very had to do anything on a computer without a space bar I discovered, you can’t write anything. So another shopping mission I decided to add to my exploding luggage and buy a keyboard to plug in to it. I might as well have brought my office with me. We already had too much stuff. Oh well. We left Denmark and then into Germany. We stopped at a supermarket. No keyboard but a great opportunity to waist yet more time chatting eating crisps and bumbling. Another town, another supermarket. They had keyboards but a shop assistance informed me that it wouldn’t work with my Mac. We asked if any shops in Hamburg would be open on a Sunday and he said yes, we are in the country and the computer shop there is the biggest in Germany. Happy with our progress to get my lappy back we headed for Hamburg. It got dark and started to rain again. Hamburg was still 2 hours away. We rode straight into town. “First hotel ok with you?” Gary shouted. A big thumbs up from me. I had only thin gloves on, as my big ones were still wet from England. I couldn’t feel my fingers any more and they felt like shovels attached to my arms. Numb, wet and cold we found a hotel and Gary went to see the reception. He came out and said that there was a festival in Hamburg and all the hotels are booked up. Dark wet and cold we then rode round and round town looking for somewhere to stay. After the 4th hotel Gary then ran out of petrol. On reserve we carried on to yet another hotel. I asked where the nearest fuel station was and if he had a room. It looked far too plush for us but worth an ask. No luck with the room but at least directions to a fuel stop. In the fuel station Gary painted a very pissed off picture. I tried to put on a brave face on things but it was nearly 11pm and still no place to stay. I decided to ask the man in the station He said there was a hotel not far from there which he thought would have a room. We followed his directions and came across it 25h a very pink hotel and looked quite trendy. We walked into the lobby and got ready for the knock back ‘we are full line.’ A smiley receptionist said ‘We have one room left, would you like to see it?’ “No” we both said at the same time, enough is enough. “We will take it.” At that point we heard thee rain outside move up a gear from a steady trickle to chuck it down in buckets mode. Our moods lifted with the thought that we could have been caught in that down pour, and although we were a little damp and stood in a pink lobby things could have been so much worse.

The room was spacious. Very trendy for trendys sake. Open plan amazing retro features, disgusting wallpaper like a bad taste party shirt and then there was the concrete ceiling.... Why? Nice room to some ones taste (not mine) but could they not finish it. Some design buff must have said that was cool and the simplicity of the grey concrete was pleasing to the eye. All that considered it had a bed, a shower and somewhere to dry our wet gear. We had dinner in the bar didn’t realize the time 12am, good time to eat but needs must.

After a good nights rest we headed into town on the bikes to try and get the damn keyboard. Hamburg seemed to take on a new light and looked very different to the night previous in the dark and rain. It is funny how you can judge a place really by your mood. I wonder how many places I have written off as crap just because I was in a bad mood. I suppose it goes the other way too. You could have really good memories of a place but really it is a shit hole to anyone not happy in them selves.

We waited for the computer shop to open. Success a keyboard, a bit big but needs must. I could put wheels on it and drag it behind me.

After a computer shop overload in riding kit far too hot for shopping we then set off to try and find our freight boat ‘Hornline” we found it and stopped by a kiosk with a little man saying we could not go any further.

‘But we are booked on that boat tomorrow.”

“Then come back tomorrow.”

“Can we see it from the road?” we asked

“Yes from the bridge.”

We headed back down the road and from there we could see our boat which tomorrow would be our home for 19 days to Costa Rica. I got butterflies looking at it. The longest I had been on a boat for was 2 days and that was when I was a kid with my Dad. We sure as hell didn’t cross the Atlantic then. I gulped with the thought. We headed back to the hotel and packed our stuff best we could. We didn’t really know much about the boat and didn’t know if we would be able to see or get to our bikes so we thought it best to make everything easy to take off.

 

1st October 2007

7 am the alarm goes off I was almost waiting for it to play it’s little tune so I was allowed to get up as I was already wide awake and wired. I hate it when I feel like this I usually make mistakes and panic. No good for anyone. It took 3 lift journeys to take our stuff down to the bikes and then there was the dreaded packing task. By now it was 8.30 and we had to be there between 9 and 10. We stopped off at a garage had some breakfast and Gary announces that he needs a poo... bloody hell a poo at this stage in the game. Why do men take so long to poo? I waited patiently by my bike, helmet on ready for a quick get away. Gary swaggered back “do you know it is 9.30

“You’re joking, right.” Gary looks at his watch

“I wish”

Another dash to chase another boat. We got to the kiosk we visited the day before and this time we allowed through.

“Blue container” the kiosk man said “Security”

We parked up and now my heart was pounding it all seemed real now. I need a fag! We got our passes and was met by a guy in a van,

“Horncap?” he shouted to us

“Yes”

“Follow me.”

We followed the van through boxes, containers forklifts and lots of men in florescent jackets and hard hats.

We then had our first sight of the ship close up. My Christ that’s big. We were told to park next to the gangplank and I thought we would create a load of hassle but no. A few guys looked at the bikes

“Do we need to unload them?” I asked a man

“Yes”

“Do you want to load them now?” I asked, waiting for lots of information.

“Later” with that he wondered off. Great, man of so many words made things so much clearer, not.

Ok so we just better get the stuff off then. A man came down and said that he would show us to our cabin. He helped us with our gear and then on to the boat. Little steps up the gangplank with heavy bike gear and about 5 bags really were hard going. It seems to be the only down side with a bike your fine when you are on the bike but get off and you turn into a fish with no water.

The cabin was great, campaign, chocolate flowers and crisp white sheets. Oh yes, I could get used to this but we were supposed to be on a hardy road trip.

Back at the bikes the anticipation that they may be loaded. We waited around watching the boat being loaded with brand new cars. They drove two cars on the ramp and then lifted them with a crane into the ships hold. It all looked a bit wobbly and left the question of now how would they lift our bikes. All would come clear I suppose. We had dinner on the boat, 3 courses. Really nice food. We were handed a food schedule. Breakfast at 7.30 am, Dinner at 11.30am, tea and cake at 3.30pm. Dinner at 7.30 pm. It seemed a lot of food and not much to do in the way of exercise. We usually loose weight when we travel but I think way may end up a couple of porkers not able to even get on I bikes let alone ride them.

Not much in the way of loading bikes we decided to go back into Hamburg by taxi and buy a few more things. My panic bought shoes was now killing me big blisters on both heals. I decided to buy yet another pair of shoes. Christ knows how much money we have spent on this trip. Its not way we normally travel. I re-mortgaged my flat for this and worked like a demon. All the same I wasn’t going to be uncomfortable in shitty shoes for 19 days on a boat.

We caught another taxi back to the port. I was worried that they might have loaded our bikes while we were gone. As the taxi pulled up to the boat I felt a sense of relief, as they were still where we left them amongst lots of port mayhem and activity. More waiting and we got chatting to Irish guy who worked with the loading team. I asked how they were going to load the bikes

“They don’t know yet, and if I was you I would make sure you are around.”

“Do you know when they will load them?” I asked

“ After the cars, there was a cock up and they are having to be re-shuffled in the hold, we don’t mind, more overtime no rush.”

It was now getting dark we had dinner and met our fellow passengers. All a little dull apart from one guy called Fabian who we both took a shine to. He was from Argentina a sweet oldish guy who reminded me of Paddington Bear, I don’t know why. Gary explained we wanted to learn Spanish. His eyes lit up. “No problem I will teach you if you help me with me English.”

We were in the bar and dashing in and out looking to see if they had moved the bikes. Gary knocked on the window. “They are loading them.” I ran to get my camera and was down the gangplank in a shot. They had strapped them into a cradle thing and they looked like little horses in a stable. An hour later a big hook was lowered from the ships crane and then attached to the cradle. The next minute our precious bikes were swinging through the air. I thought how cool they looked our Flying Hondas. It all happened so quick all that waiting was over. Gary shot up the gangplank to see the bikes in the ships hold. They gave him a yellow hard hat and he went down to see how they were strapping them. All good we sat and had a drink in the bar. I felt that we could relax now a hectic few days chasing boats but we had made it and I think we both needed a bit of a rest and we have 19 days to do that. Next stop Costa Rica.

The boat was supposed to leave at 10pm and then 12pm then 4am. We finally left at 7.30am. It was really exciting to feel the ship moving and a sense of relief that were finally on out way.

Louise Hillier and Gary Prisks Journey September 28th 2007

7th October

Woke up feeling a lot better the sea had calmed down and then the sun was coming up bright orange and red over a dark blue sea. Gary seemed a little fed up ‘If they said we could get off tomorrow I would be glad’ shit 12 days to go and already we were going a little mad. The truth is we had worked so hard for this trip and the boat had given us a chance to re-charge our batteries we had nothing to think about. What to eat, who was washing up? All taken care of. A chance to assess everything without the clutter of everyday chores but the novelty was wearing off and we were now ready to get on the road only we were in the middle of the Atlantic. No roads here.

We had a chance to see and feel dry land at the Azores and though it was only a quick shuttle like trip around the island. It was just what we needed. An amazing island stunning views. All too quick though, we were whisked round the place in a taxis. Then a call from the boat as they had finished loading they were ready for the off. The taxis driver then went from whisking to blending and sped towards the dock with his brill creamed hair (a stain above his door proof of his hair slicking was not just for us) We paid his fee and with that we were back to being in the middle Atlanrtic with the rumble of the ships engine.

The days seemed to move more slowly and now it was my turn for cabin fever I woke up in a very bad mood nothing was right and the grey sky and rough sea gave me no reason to feel any different. My mood changed at lunch it was like a sketch out of Monty Python. We all sat roundtable clothed tables with a jug of water and three courses to get through. The boat was going nuts up and down like riding the whoops too slow we tried to eat the food put in front of us. Up eat, fast. Down grab jug, glass plate and anything else on the table before it is following the motion of the boat. It was like eating a three-course meal on a roller coaster.

We went through a storm and it was the strangest sound the rain seemed to fizz as it hit the ocean. What a weird place. I have been though the desert and even though the desert seems like nothing lives there. If ever you wanted a pee or stopped and looked there would always be some sort of life be a bug, bird (or a man, that you didn’t know where he came from) In the middle of the ocean there seemed to be nothing no sign of life just blue meets blue.

Two weeks on the boat we had managed it and we had crossed the Atlantic and were now crossing the Caribbean Sea we came into port at Guadeloupe I had a mobile signal so could contact home. It was great to hear from everyone again the last time we spoke to anyone was the week previous and we had the news that the campsite had been broken into. Windows smashed and doors kicked in. Great news when at that point had only been at sea for a week.

We took an excursion with our fellow passengers around the island. What a great place markets full of spices, vegetables and fish, waterfalls and rain forests We had lunch in a restaurant over looking the sea. Gary and I then had to make sense of the menu in French. I asked for fish with no bones and Gary the same but a different dish. Mine turned up looking like what used to but a fish but Gary’s a big pile of tentacles, well it didn’t have any bones I suppose.

Now the 6th October and we have been aboard for 6 days. The routine of the boat life stops us from getting bored. Mainly eating DVDs and drinking just like home really. We had a welcome party last night, a lovely meal. All the crew are from the Ukraine and Russia We got talking to one of the officers who ended up drinking with us and smoking Golden Virginia he said that he hadn’t smoked for years very drunk we stumbled back to our cabin. Gary locked the door and thought that I may have gave the wrong impression ‘A bit too friendly’ and thought we might end up with more than just us in the room. After the previous nights adventures I awoke to feel far from normal the sea had got very rough and joined with a hangover gave me no option than to lay on my bed and feel sorry for myself. Ah but I wasn’t sick!

15th October - The ships BBQ.

A big long table was laid out for us ships crew at one end and us and other passengers. Great BBQ, free beer flowing, everyone taking photos from the bridge. One of the officers wearing white shorts was leaning over also taking photos Gary whispered to me “Wouldn’t it be funny to tell him his cock was hanging out as from the angle we were sitting you could see right up his shorts, we couldn’t see anything but he didn’t know that. Gary and I pointed to his leg he looked down and sheepishly went off confused and thinking that we had seen his manhood. We then felt guilty and thought maybe we had hurt his feeling. I later went on the bridge and saw the officer we had embarrassed through the window I smiled and gave him the thumbs up. I later thought about it and this probably had made matters worse “Yeah baby, have seen your bits and they are just fine.” He probably thought. Oh dear. After the BBQ we went to the bar and drunk vodka with our chief steward Sergey.

16th October

Woke up and my head felt like it was in a vice and oh what I would have given to be on dry land right now. Hangover and feeling like shit we had our last Spanish lesson with Fabian who was getting off at our next stop Cartenjena Columbia. We caught site of the port in the dark and said goodbye to sweet Paddington Bear with a cheeky smile and a great sense of humor.

Gary and I started to get concerned about the bikes as the loading crew, which got on were like ships rats. They were everywhere. We hadn’t seen the bikes since the Azores and hoped they would be ok.

17th October Columbia /Turbo

The boat left Cartenjena at 8.30am and we had a day swimming in the deck pool and on the running machine (Guilt for drinking so much at the ships bbq and convinced that I had put on 3 stone since boarding this floating restaurant) As the boat chugged towards Torbo the skyline changed to blue and purple mountains with clouds hanging in an angry sky. The water had turned green and murky and was completely flat when we loaded our bikes in Hamburg only 17 days ago we met the ships cargo planner. He was really interested in our bikes and told us that our bikes the bikes should be fine just watch out in Turbo. “They have sticky fingers there, maybe get the ship can get you a tarp or something” We were now only half an hour from Turbo and our bikes were in the hold where all the bananas were going to be loaded.

Decided to make a bit of a fuss and Gary was given permission to move the bikes. Thank god he did, as the hold where the bikes were was empty and our bikes very easy targets. Two days in Turbo and onwards to our final destination on our banana boat.

19th October

Arrived in Costa Rica and although explaining to the ships steward that no we really didn’t want to go on a tour we were herded like sheep towards a waiting minibus. “We want to see the bikes being unloaded.” I said to Sergay

“No problem the unload them tomorrow no problem.” That seemed to be his answer to everything. Ah well a tour with our fellow lemmings and we saw a bit of Cost Rican wildlife. 3 hours later we got back to the dockside and there were our bikes.

Mine a bit scuffed and had gained some red paint from somewhere. Indicators bent and then we noticed a few bits missing. Bastards.

The dockworkers looked really dodgy and their folk lift driving not to great either. One crashed into the post right by our bikes. We just wanted to get the hell out of there. So asked if we could go now?

Customs was the reply and was told that our agent would be out to the boat soon. Time was getting on and now 4.30 decided to go to the customs gate ourselves. No joy you need an agent. Our agent arrived and told us that due to the fact that it was Friday our bikes could not go through customs till Monday.

29th October

Will fill in the missing bits of diary as soon as I can’t do everything it seems. We got our bikes out of Costa Rica customs. Got on the road and are now staying with friends. Have seen a volcano got wet through in mental rain and fed crocodiles chicken from a bridge so all is good. Heading for Panama early tomorrow.

1st November

We are now in Panama City. Had the worst day riding I have ever had yesterday.

We rode from David to Panama City 480kms. Met a lovely guy called Luigi from

Italy. He has ridden from Alaska. Met him at the border crossing and he rode

with us to Panama city. I bet he wishes he didn’t now. We had really heavy

rain and felt like someone was throwing marbles at you then later in the day

With only 40 kms to go on the Pan Am my bike front wheel caught in a crack in

the rode. It sent it into a fish tailing effect I tried to get it back under

control but going around 65mph and lots of weight on the on the back nearly

got it back but then went down. I slid for what seemed like forever and could

see the tarmac wizzing past. SHIT!!!! The road was really busy and a fuck off

great big red truck behind me. As I was sliding I saw Luigi go past also out

of control and he ended up in the gully between the two carriageways. Gary

didn’t see what happened and went on. I stood up and could not believe that I

could. I was quite composed, I didn’t panic. I switched the bike off then ran

Over to Luigi “You ok?” he sat there but seemed ok too. I then went back to my

bike and with help put it upright again. The pannier box was caved in and bent

and the hand guard very scuffed but that was all. We righted Luigi’s bike and

His brand new KLR had a few scars but was ok to ride. I then started to

realize what had happened and felt like I was going to cry. Luigi said we had

better get out of here because of the police. Gary came back and went very white with what had happened. We rode to Panama City bruised but ok and then Gary got a puncture!!!

Fixed that with Luigi and I comparing notes on what the hell had happened he had come off avoiding me. I am quite glad he did apparently at one point he could see my head in front of wheel. YICKES.

Headed in to the city and ended up in an expensive shitty hotel but there was a bar next door and that made things a little better.

So there you go yesterday I should have stayed in bed!!!

3rd November

Bruises now a bit better and Gary sorted out my bent pannier. I keep thinking now how lucky I was. We booked our bikes on the flight to Quito Ecuador yesterday. Took all day to sort out but they are with the freight forwarder now and we are now bike less in Panama city. The bikes can’t fly till Wednesday so we are probably flying out ourselves on Monday. Had a hot day today and watched the parades as it is Panama celebrations which basically means that everything is shut for 3 days and there is a lots of men dressed in white uniforms doing what looks like Monty python funny walks. Very funny.

4th November

Moved hotels to a cheaper hotel put all our stuff in a taxi and Luigi followed on his bike. He is going to Columbia and we were thinking of joining him but got scared and decided after reading the embassy reports that we didn’t want to be kidnapped or mugged. (Funny that) Spent the afternoon watching yet more parades. The girls in the parade looked a bit kinky with high boots and mini skirts. Luigi’s eyes lit up when it started to rain he took lots of photos. I think he had his own personal wet tee shirt competition.

8th November

The bikes and us have made it to Quito Ecuador and we are planning to get on the road again Sunday. Customs took all day to get the bikes out and now Gary is repairing the bent bits on my bike. Not too much damage, my pannier box was the worst, it is 3 mm thick and it went right through. We have had a look around the old town today and bought bits and pieces for the bikes. It is amazing what you can find. It is like a maze of little shops everything on display behind glass. Ideal for us as we can just point. It seems to rain every afternoon here so we are planning to get up quite early on Sunday. It is also very high up 10000 feet above see level so just walking up stairs makes you out of breath. Haven't managed to put any pictures on the site yet will keep trying.

10th November

Decided as we were so close to go to the equator and step over the line, well it has to be done I suppose. My bike was still having bits set with Araldite so rode without a screen or headlight cowl. The bike looked quite strange. Almost like a rat bike. As we rode out of the hotel garage the heavens opened. We seem to have a big rain cloud following us. I don’t think I have ever ridden in so much rain. We took a few wrong turns and ended up miles away from where we wanted to be. Sheltered in a café and waited for the rain to give up. It didn’t so we just got back on the bikes. My trousers were far from waterproof and sitting on the bike felt like a cold puddle. We found the equator and it turned out to be like lands end only with lots of loud shit music and people selling crap trinkets. There was an orange line showing where North and South divided and a building with a globe on top. It was getting late so took some photos and back to the hotel. The rain had now turned up the volume and because we are so high it was cold to. I had to put my winter gloves and heated waistcoat. The traffic was really heavy like London but with electric buses whizzing past mad taxi drivers cutting you up. We got to some traffic lights and sat waiting for them to change. I felt a big bump and turned around the car behind me nudged me, I shouted to Gary “That car wanker just ran into me” I put my horn and tried to get out of the way the car then it rolled into Gary. “What the fuck” Then he rolled into both of us. We managed to get out of the way and looked in the window of the car. The guy was asleep!! We had sounded both horns but he hadn’t heard a thing. The guy then woke up and took off up the road with every obscenity Gary and I could muster. What a tosser!! He could have at least said sorry. Wet through we are getting on the road tomorrow. I hope it stops raining. It’s like being in England but I have heard you have got sunshine.

14th November

Well the last couple of days have been a mixed bag. We left Quito early in the morning and got some miles under our belts. It felt good to be on the road and as we made our way down the pan am mountain roads we both felt good getting out of the city. I was still quite shaken from my accident and I think Gary found it quite frustrating with me bumbling behind having my own personal panic attacks about cracks in the road. We met some other bike travelers on GSs. Had a long chat with them and then back to mile munching. They turned off at Banos and we carried on. It wasn’t long after that the rain started again. The scenery was bleak we stopped to change gloves and I could see my breathe. Cold and wet we carried on. The elevation in some parts was 3500 meters. I was stoked with my heated vest kept me warm. Getting dark we dropped down to a little town called Alausui.

The next day we headed off as early as we could but couldn’t get out of the hostel as the staff didn’t seem to want to get out of bed to unlock the gates. The sun was out and the roads were like playing an arcade game. Pothole, pig in gutter, rock falls, dogs flying out from nowhere to try and eat you, random dirt road with more potholes usually on a corner so just to try and catch you out. Tell you what it gave me more to think about than just cracks in the road. We stopped in Cuenca and had some lunch. We couldn’t park the bikes where we could see them but the place seemed safe enough. On the way back Gary decided to have his boots polished. I went back to check the bikes. I looked at my to discover that my blue bag was gone. FUCK, I ran back to Gary. He leapt off the shoe-polishing chair. They had stolen my pack containing my heated waistcoat, Levi jeans and all out toiletries. Went to the police like they were helpful, not. After a lot of swearing and bit of crying we decided to press on. We got about 15kms down the road I looked up at the threatening sky and realized that my waterproof trousers had also gone. I made pointy gestures referring to the clouds and then pointing to my trousers and shaking my head. We stopped and decided to turn back to the shitty thieving town. Found a supermarket and replaced my waterproof trousers and my pants. I wouldn’t mind only I had bloody washed the ones they took. I wish they had been stinking for the thieving shits.

Yesterday we rode to Vilcabamba more rain and the waterproof trousers I bought split as I pulled them over my boots and then as I got on the bike a big ripping sound as the crotch also gave in. Oh yeah I love this! We had a thunderstorm above us I was sitting in yet another puddle and going down mountain roads. The light at the end of the tunnel was the amazing place we found to stay. Really hot shower in lovely cabin. Bikes outside safe www.rendezvousecudor.com

19th November

Sorry haven’t had much of chance to update the diary as we have been on the road everyday and tried to eat up the miles. The landscape has been amazing a silky tarmac road beside the sea. Towns that smell of fish and other towns that just smell. Peru seems to be very, very poor and in places Gary and I compared it to Africa only you sort of expect it there. We are now riding with a fellow Brit called Tim on a GS. We have just today ridden through the devastated area of Pisco and were really shocked. The people hit by the earthquake had nothing much to start with, a very sad sight. We are now at an Oasis for Gary’s Birthday and hope to watch the sunset in the dunes tomorrow.

24th November

The last few days we have been just riding and sleeping trying to gat to Cusco. It has been a bit of a mission but we made it here yesterday with a storm following us through the mountains. We have been riding in very high altitude and the both our bikes have been struggling and burping up the steep mountain roads at one point we were at 4500 meters. Getting off the bikes made you tired and it was really hard to catch your breath. It was really weird how everything expanded. At one stop I thought my top box had come open but it was the roll mats inside the box. They had expanded so much that it had pushed the box lid nearly open. I pulled out a shampoo bottle from my pack and it had bloated into a really funny shape. Silly move I opened the lid. Splat, it exploded in my face I had white shampoo all over my face. Gary and Tim didn’t find it funny at all, not much. They could hardly get back on their bikes through laughing. The villages in the mountains were like how imagined Peru to be. Really friendly all the kids in their wooly hats seemed to wave as you past them and made you feel quite special. The views were something else big snow capped mountains that looked like they had been carved. The roads were swooping and switch back bends. You seemed to just get out of one corner and you were into the next one. Motorbike heaven!

Yesterday we were in another little town I had some chicken soup (which really was a chunk of chicken a few noodles in a bowl of luke warm white water) on another plate came a sliced up chili and lime. I tried to give the soup a bit of a kick and plopped the chili in the murky water. Flipping heck that’s hot I thought and started coughing. I spooned the chili back on the plate from which it came from and carried on slurping my soup. I had had enough and Gary being Gary inspected my plates for what he could eat. A bit of bread and is that red pepper? He picked the chili up in his fingers put it on the bread and was just about to eat it. “Chili” I said just in time. Just about to jump on the bikes again Gary went for a pee and came back looking far from happy. My willys burning and eyes watering asked what to do. Milk works I said water will make it worse. We just so happened to have some evaporated milk left over from an earlier tea on the road session. Gary went off to the toilets and came back still not happy I forgot to wash my hands first and I think I made it worse. His pain did go but it was really funny to think of him dunking his balls in evaporated milk.

28th November

Well we have been in Cusco for 5 days now and although we have not been on the road it hasn’t been with out its events. The day we arrived in Cusco we met a guy called Geoff who owns the Norton Rats Bar in the main square of Cusco. He recommended us a hostel and we went for more than a few beers in his bar. A great fun night though the next day my head did pay. Hangovers are bad enough at the best of times with out being at altitude and that seemed to make things worse. Hangover over the next day Gary got food poisoning. It was really scary to see him that ill and he threw up all night. Luckily here you can buy antibiotics over the counter and with a bit of bad Spanish and miming the girl in the chemist handed over the drugs to make Gary better. It took Gary 2 days to start feeing himself again.

The bikes are in the hostel courtyard and as we walked past I smelt petrol. “Gary your bikes leaking.” We were going to go out but thought we had better switch the petrol off and move the bike incase someone walked past with a fag. Pushed the bike with the petrol switched off and it was still pissing out. Shit we had better sort this one out. On closer inspection the bike was leaking petrol from the air box. What the??? Tools out and Gary undid the air box. Petrol came gushing out. He found the problem it was our new Touratech locking petrol caps!!! The cap doesn’t seem to breathe and at this altitude in the sun the plastic tanks got pressurized then add the fact that we couldn’t seem to find chain lube anywhere and we had been coating our chains with engine oil which flings everywhere when riding had blocked the carb breather, so long and short. Petrol tank pressurized then pushed petrol into carb no carb overflow pushed petrol into engine that then pushed petrol into air box then all over the floor.

Gary pulled the spark plug out and pressed the start button to get some of the petrol out. It spurted everywhere. Out of the engine and exhaust. Are you sure you should do that? I said my mechanical knowledge not that good but know that petrol everywhere could cause a fire. Its fine I was told I’ve got to get the petrol out of the engine somehow.

Won’t be having a fag too close then. I sat with Tim across the courtyard and he was telling stories of how he once went to a scrap yard where a guy working on his car petrol everywhere and his mate was throwing lit matches at him. You see its not the petrol itself that is flammable it is the fumes.

I looked back at Gary still tinkering with his bike. Then WHOOF flames shot out of Gary’s bike. Fuck Me.... WATER. Everyone from the hostel ran around to try and find some water Gary stayed by his bike blowing on it. Wet towels and buckets of water his Dommie survived with not a torched bit on it.

We must of gave our land lady a heart attach, scared the shit out of me.

We left the bike in search of a motorcycle shop bought new oil drained the bike took the exhaust off and then fired it up. Without the flames, thank god.

Yesterday we went to Machu Picchu on the train we were up at 4.30 am to catch the train but it was well worth it an amazing sight. An Inca city set high up in the mountains.

We are back on the road tomorrow and on our way to Bolivia then we have changed our route slightly and we are heading to Buenos Aires to ship to Oz as it seems to be cheaper. 3500 kms to ride before we can ship out.

30th November

We made it into Bolivia from Cusco in one day. A 550 km ride. We rode the most amazing roads through the mountains. The road seemed to follow a railway track and the road changed from sweeping mountain bends to big wide open spaces the hills were coloured a yellowish green with a strip of black tarmac in between. We arrived at the border and met some guys in a big overland truck with 12 passengers. We were going to stop at Puno Puru but after a conversation with the overland bus driver who said a few days before he had been held up at gun point for money was really glad we moved on. The border was very quiet and our timing seemed really good as a big storm was following us and we got through customs just before they shut. We arrived at Cococabama just before dark found a hotel and headed out for something to eat. I said as we walked down the road that it seemed really quiet. As we had our dinner a carnival kicked off outside they had big bands and seemed to be doing a dance a bit like the Hacka in traditional dress. Very strange. We have seen so many carnivals on the road it seemed almost the norm. Our Spanish is still so bad that we never seem to know what the hell is going on..

1st Dec

We had a day chillin in Cococabama. We sat by lake Titicaca had a coke and soaked up the sun

2nd December

Today was one of the most memorable rides I have ever had. We got on the bikes at 9.30ish and rode for about 30km on a road beside the lake. We stopped to have breakfast with a view to die for. It was so quiet no one around and as we drank our coffee looked over the lake and the sculpted terraced hills. Another 10km and we arrived at the ferry town. Ferry now that makes you think of P & O with well organized boats to shuttle your vehicle across the water. Oh no this was Bolivia. Basically planks of wood with big gaps between a small outboard engine to propel the raft like thing with coaches and cars onboard across the lake. A coach was ahead of us and we were directed on behind him. The crossing was with out too much rocking and was ok but then we realized that there was only one way on and we were going to have to back the bikes off. I watched the shoreline approach and was really worried as to how we were going to get the bikes off. I had visions of three bikes sinking. As it was we got one bike off at a time backwards and Gary me and Tim pulled each bike over the old gappy planks. The coach driver was a bit pissed off that we took so long and started bibing his horn. What a twat.

We then drove towards La Paz and after dicing with the traffic in the rain we ended up coming down a mountain road which made you feel sick, it was so so high up with La Paz stretching out into the distance. We then ended up on a very muddy track with big buses coming the other way. I stood on my pegs following Tim and Gary and just prayed that I wouldn’t end up on the deck in the sticky muddy mess I was ridding over. We had been really cold earlier and it was amazing as we wound our way down the road the temperature suddenly warmed up. We are now camping outside a hotel warm and worn out. We had only ridden 150 kms but it felt like 4 times that.

4th December

The last two days riding have been a mixed bag. From La Paz we headed for a town called Oruro. What a dusty dump of a place! We managed to find somewhere to stay but the toilets were like something out of train spotting. I know we are hard tough travelers but I think that a sink full of backed up shit is beyond the call of duty. We had dinner in a restaurant recommended in the Lonely Planet which said had amazing food, complete lie! Anyway long and short either the nasty hotel or dodgy food I got the shits for the 3rd time this trip!!! Not nice. Just about made it to Potosi before I exploded. Which was a real shame because the scenery was really dramatic like something out of a western.

We had met two other bikers on the road a guy on a Aprillia who chatted for a bit and said he had just ridden the worst road of his life and had fallen off 5 times. We said that we are going on the other paved road as we thought there were two. We arrived at a hotel in town and I spent the rest of the day and night in bed or on the toilet. Gary went out to find information on the roads and we discovered to our horror that there is only ONE road to the border and it is 500 kms of dirt. It is now the rainy season in Bolivia and last night there was an enormous storm. I don’t know if storms sound louder here as we are so high 4200 m or if the rainy season has started with a bang but we are both worried as to the condition of the roads. They say it is 12 hours in a bus to the border so we are heading out early and hope to make it to Tapizi. We have only road tyres and a can of petrol. SHIT!!!!

8th December

Right we made it out of Bolivia the off road nightmare turned out to be the most amazing scenery and breathtaking views yet.

10th December

Thought I had better get you up to speed as we haven’t had much of a chance to go into any internet cafes. The day we left Potsi I was really sick in the morning but got on the road anyway, we just wanted out of there we were both really fed up with Bolivia and being ill we were both craving some normality. So we headed out on to the dirt road with lots of different information. The roads are terrible, the buses struggle, there is no petrol and it is really cold!! The road turned out to be half paved and the rest dry rocky tracks which our Dommies coped with lovely though mine got a bit shaken and the repairs from the crash let go so my screen was a bit of a baggy mess by the time we hit tarmac again. We are both feeling ourselves again and I think that altitude really messes with your head. I know that it makes my petrol tank swell up so god knows what it does to your brain. Any way as we went down in altitude our moods improved and so did the temperature it has now warmed up lovely. The border into Argentina took 3 hours to get through but worth it. As soon as you get across the line things get better.

We rode to Salta and on the way I had the misfortune to be following a pissed moped rider. Gary was a head of me and a guy on a moped came flying into a round about and then hit gravel. It all happened so slowly and I saw his head hit the ground with such force and with no helmet on I thought he was dead then the bike and him came to a stop on the kerb. He was motionless. Gary didn’t see what happened and had gone on. I parked my bike and ran towards the poor guy. I flagged down cars and then went back to the poor man who was still not moving. The bike was on top of him exhaust on his leg. I pulled the bike off of him and was told by a car driver to leave him. The poor man started to come around and looked very confused. He tried to sit up but was pulled back to a lying position by the car driver. His head was lower than his body and blood was gushing from his head. It was now that I wished I had done that first aid course I had promised myself I would do before I left. Someone called an Ambulance and then with that the injured man got up and managed to get on his moped. No one stopped him and with blood gushing from his head and arm he rode off. I think when his senses came back either he couldn’t afford to go to hospital or maybe the police would be a problem as he was pissed.

We have now made in to the wine growing area of Argentina and the landscape yesterday was like riding through a slice of Mars red mountains and dusty hills leading down to lots of vineyards. Camped in an amazing campsite and decided to have a day off in the sun.

20th December

God don’t you just hate computers sometimes. I had just spent an hour typing the update for this page and the computer quit! Bugger.

28th December 2007

Hope everyone had a nice Christmas. We are now in Oz and heading for Sydney in a rented van. Our bikes have been delayed in Argentina and after a week of trying to organize them to arrive at the same time as us finally I am afraid that the Christmas holidays won and we ended up in Sydney with no wheels. The bikes should now arrive on 5th January all being well and I really hope they do.

We flew to Melbourne and had a lovely Christmas with Jude Tosh and their family a big thanks to Sara and Colin for making a special ozzy Christmas for the bikeless bikers.

We have now hired a small van and borrowed some pillows for a bed and we are now driving back to Sydney for New Year. Australia is a real culture shock after South America. Driving on the right side of the road and roads actually mean that they have tarmac on them. Have seen lots of bikes on the road and cant wait to join them the sun is out the roads are lovely and we are in a van, but we are still happy.

2nd January 2008

First of all a Happy New Year to anyone reading this. We are still in the hire van and we have now updated our li-los to second hand mattresses so we have a bit more comfort while we wait for our bikes to come. It starting to get to both of us now and we are finding Australia really expensive.

On a good note we met up with Julia and Phil who are on their honeymoon and had a wonderful new year managed to be outside the opera house to watch the fireworks over Sydney harbour bridge what an amazing sight so cool to be with friends and see that.

5th January

Well we are still in a van and it has been 2 weeks. We are getting quite used to finding free car parks to sleep in. We have become a couple of gypsy’s but life isn’t so bad. Sometimes you just have to accept and enjoy where you are. It has been great having a van and we have driven about 2000 kms having a look around the South East coast. Have not seen a kangaroo yet but have seen possums cockatoos and pelicans. The coast is really amazing sandy white beaches and a lovely blue sea. The bikes better turn up soon before we go soft.

Our bikes are still delayed and have not left Argentina yet nothing is ever easy is it especially when you are relying on other people. Phoned Dakar Motos today and was told that they will try their up most to get them here next week. Thing is the longer they take the less time we have here we still have to get them through customs,

So no bikey news this end but I have just heard the Dakar is cancelled for the first time in 30 years. What a nightmare. I bet there are a few gutted riders there.

14th January

Well we haven’t been on our bikes for nearly a month and I beginning to wonder if I can still ride a bike. We are now about 200 kms from Sydney at Newcastle. We have had quite an expensive time here but we have lived as cheaply as we could with no camping equipment and stove as that was left with the bikes. Our van road trip has been kind of fun and life seems to revolve around finding a shower (nearly always cold) but although we are proper gypsies we don’t smell too bad. The other pastime has been looking for Wi-fi with my lap top as internet cafés seem to be far and few between and when you find one they are $2.50 for 15 minutes. We look very dodgy sitting outside people’s houses. If you are in Oz at the moment reading this and you see a Ute Hire van outside your house, don’t panic we haven’t got guns we are just stealing your modem signals.

17th January

The Shipping Disaster

After a month of living in the back of a hire van and biding time waiting for the bikes to turn up, disappointment after disappointment. A beautiful. View or an amazing beach would be spoilt by the thought in the back of our minds of our trip slowly going down the toilet. When we left Argentina we were promised that the bikes would be with by the 28th December, latest. That came and went then we were then told 5th January no problem. That date also came and with lots of frantic e-mails and expensive phone calls to Buenos Aires were told that we may have to pay more money to get the bikes here. The quote we had was £1250 per bike by air to save time. We were then asked to pay another £300 per bike. “Ok” we will pay it we had no choice. “If we pay this will our bikes be on a flight?” “Yes no problem” I should know better than to listen to that phrase. As soon as someone says that it usually means “Big problem” and true to form there was a big problem.

On 11th January I received this e-mail from Silver Freight:

...........

Dear Louise Sara Hillier & Gary Jonathan Prisk

I so sorry of all the time that the motos are delaid, the problem was, that the aircompany doen t give space to load it on any fly and not all the aircompany can load Dangerous Goods, and the company how have the space are to much expensive.

Well the motos will be flying next Wednesday (16/01/08) on Lan Chile to take the next fly with Quantas to Sydney. I will send all the details of the cargo next Monday, by the way, this is important: to make the guia we need some adress to localizate you or some friend how is living on Australia, the aircompany need that details.

 

Thank you very much and best regards

...........

Great we have a date! I then asked to have an airway bill number and the flight details, this was promised for the next day. The next day came and no e-mail. It was the 15th January and still no confirmation and airline number. I then got this e-mail from Silver Freight:

..........

Dear Louise and Gary,

Sandra Toll me that you were finish your journal on Australia, and may be

you need to send the Motos to Singapore, it is better to all to send the

Motos to Singapore, please we need to know then you will be arrived to

Singapore, to evaluate that it is better to send there. Because if I send

the motors to Sydney Tomorrow, they are arriving to Sydney on 7 days. That

is the why we need that information.

Thank

........

What ??? We had agreed to the 7 days and agreed to pay more money and we had tried our best not to loose our tempers but what was going on now?

I phoned Sandra who has tried her very best to sort the nightmare out but she was getting lied to too. “Are the bikes leaving? Have we got a flight number?”

“I don’t know.” She was very distressed with the situation and offered to give us our money back that we paid for her services. “No we don’t want a refund we just want our bikes.” The next day we got up really earlier drove round the streets looking for Wi-Fi. I checked my e-mail. Nothing no e-mails from the freight company or Sandra. I don’t like this, I don’t think the bikes went. Another call and our fears were confirmed. The bikes didn’t leave and were not likely to leave in the next few days. I think we were just fed a load bullshit from Silver Freight so we didn’t give them any hassle.

It turned out that Silver Freight had given us a quote for the bikes that was too low and instead of admitting they had screwed up they had spent a month trying to get the bikes to Australia for their quote and they had fed us lies to keep us quiet. The bikes were never booked on any plane and the dates he gave were I think just plucked from the air. But each date he gave changed our direction we drove in the van and we hovered with in a 2 days driving distance of Sydney. What a complete disaster!

“The trips over.” Gary said in a depressed tone.

All the planning, saving, re-mortgaging of my home was all just to drive around Australia in a Hire van. Great. Not the motorcycle tour we were planning.

The Options Now....

After lots of tears here are our options:

Send the bikes home, something neither of us want to do.

Send the bikes to Singapore and carry on from there and try and make the best of the time we have left in Australia.

We got Sandra to get us some quotes for Singapore air and sea. The air quote came in at £2000 per bike we both gulped, that’s not an option, as we would run out of money. The sea quote came in at £500 per bike but would take a month to get there. Decided to go for the sea option and the bikes are now leaving on the 25th January. So a month to kill before Singapore.

We took the hire van back and got a ‘rent a bomb’ car. It is a 6 cylinder 4 litre Ford Falcon and what a piece of shit it is too. The tailgate does not lock so we have to back it up close to trees or walls. It chugs and wallows along smoke belching out while the engine sucks the fuel like booze to a lush. But it’s cheap and we are still mobile. Both of us feeling like scum we booked into a motel for a couple of nights the first time in a proper bed in a month. Gary has hurt his back I think the second hand mattresses have not helped. While driving on the way to the motel Gary spotted a Thai massage place. In pain he decided to give it a go. As we parked the jalopy pissed water all over the road. I don’t think you have heard the last of our new wagon full of character I think it will have a few stories in the week that we have it. I waited in the car while Gary waddled across the road like an oap who had shat himself. He returned half an hour later not looking happy at all. I was expected smiles and a relaxed look but a pained scowl. “That was horrible” he said trying to get in the car. “I said that my back is out and hurts so please be gentle and the bitch jumped on my back I told her it hurts and she just carried on the worst $35 I have ever spent.” Oh dear.

Yet another plan is hatching

Now we know we are not going to see our bikes in Oz and I guess our mission to ride our own bikes is now over. But we can still ride round the world we just have to get a couple of bikes to do it on. At a local bike shop we saw two-second hand 1994 250 Kawasaki road bikes that were the cheapest bikes they had. At home would be about £500 but here bikes are expensive and they were £1100 each. But we could sell them in Perth before we fly to Singapore.

I have also contacted a few Australian Motorcycle magazines to see if they knew of anyone that would be interested in our story and that might lend us two bikes. A long shot but might work.

So that’s it for now, no one said it would be easy.

25th January

NEW PLANS

Ok the bikes are now on a boat to Singapore and will be there on the 25th February. We have been in the Balmain Lodge motel for a week and found a great pub down the road which when you walk in you feel welcome. Australian pubs are very different from home and all seem to have big screens with dog racing or the trots on big screens, people standing round drinking schooners of beer and then going to a machine on the bar to cash their winnings. The Riverside has no betting, lots of wood and live music, so we decided to stay here and try to and get the next bit of our trip sorted out. It has been great to stay in one place and try and get a bit positive.

Over the last week we have bought countless magazines, trawled websites until our eyes were on stalks and been to nearly every bike shop in Sydney. We found an old XT 600 kicker, lovely mint green and purple. We bought this one from a South African guy for about £1000 and then went shopping for helmets, jackets, gloves as all our gear is with the Dommies. Gary has now got a 80s throwback helmet with yellow and purple graphics on it, leather gauntlets gloves with studs in them and some £2 jeans from a charity shop. I have got some dragon jeans and a £50 helmet (not as recto as Gary) The next mission was to get the bike registered which turned out to be lots more hurdles to jump. No address and no proof of id in Oz. We thought at one point that we would not be able to register it but Julia’s uncle Chris came to the rescue. He is Sgt. Major in a Sydney school and he signed a form as referee for us, Thanks Chris you are a star. My bike was proving more of a problem Gary had been a bit lucky with his and had bought it at a price that was affordable. They’re seemed to be nothing else around and only a TT250 100 miles away from Sydney and was £1500. I had come to terms with the fact I might be doing 4500 kms on a 250 and really felt we had no choice but really wasn’t looking forward to it. Gary while out and about on his 3rd visit to the RTA (no it doesn’t mean road traffic accident, it’s the roads and traffic authority) spotted a little bike garage, went in to see if he had any bikes for sale. “No” was the answer but as Gary was leaving said “Hang on mate, might know of someone selling their Xt, I will give him a call.” An hour later we were shaking hands on a blue electric start XT600.

Both our bikes are old ladies, rusty and not looking their best but we are now mobile. It felt so good to be on two wheels again as we went over Sydney bridge I could feel my face changing from the stressed all is lost look to a big smile. The air rushing past my face, my knees in the wind again and yes, control over our trip again.

We have got quite a lot of stuff that we can’t carry on the bikes so we are sending it on to Perth and we are going to try and go as light as possible. We have a month now to ride to Perth and fly to Singapore. We leave on Wednesday. Perth here we come.

28th January

Off tomorrow

The last few days we have been really good. We have been trying the best we can to get the new old bikes sorted for their 4500 kms trek. My bike has been a bit of a pain in the arse. The handlebars were bent, so replaced them outside a friendly bike breakers. We then had a few rides about town and it just still wasn’t riding right. It was really weird it kept pulling to the right on the front. I knew there was something wrong but couldn’t quite figure out what. Gary has had the front end apart 3 times. First we thought, shit the folks are bent, as one would work better than the other. Not bent, we then thought maybe it the folk oil poured that out, it looked like something out of shrek’s swamp we thought that might be the problem and after jumping up and down on the folks they seemed to work better So another ride better but still not right. It was really weird as it wasn’t all the time but a pig to ride.

We got invited to dinner with Fi from Australian Trailrider magazine and rode to her house. What a great chick, we had a lovely dinner. She races Super Moto and also trail rides. We stayed the night at her house and the next day she dug around her garage for bits and pieces to help us with our trip. Gary went out on my bike again to try and figure out what was wrong with it. “It’s the head bearings.” We new they were a bit worn but didn’t think they were that bad as the bike had only been serviced a week ago. Bugger! It was Australian day and nothing was open. Fi got her parts list out and then went into her garage came back with a big smile, “hey guys here you go.” and handed us head bearings for my bike. What’s the chances of that going to some ones house for dinner and they happen to have the exact bearing for your bike. Fi let us use her garage and then yet again my bike was dismantled. Two hours later banging and crashing the bike had new head bearings and was like new (ish).

The bikes now named Cybil and Bazil are as ready as they will ever be. Fi stickered our bikes up with “Australian Trailrider Magazine” decals so they now have a little bit of street cred. Mine only has Rego till Feb 14th (same as an MOT) so we have to be in Western Australia before that runs out, Christ so many deadlines. We have also just been lent a fuel cell to carry more fuel for the long stretches. Beats a can that we usually use just hope we don’t need it too much.

Off tomorrow early and I am really excited. Yes riding in Oz.

5th February

YEA-HA We have now got half way round the world have ridden 11,000 kms (though not all on our Dommies) Cybil and Bazil are holding up good we do miss the Dommies though. The XTs are really vibey. We have spent years customising the Dommies to what we want. Big aluminium panniers, Screens, Gel touring seats. We now have a bag strapped to the back and some £10 throw overs and everything held on with bungles and standard torture seats. But all that said we are both really happy to be on the move again.

We have ridden! 600 kms from Sydney to Adelaide and now have another 3000 kms to ride to get to Perth.

When we got to Adelaide we had a great welcome from Ben and Gill who invited us to stay. Ben works for AustralianTrailRider Magazine and we need to say yet another Big Big Thank you for inviting some dirty Poms to come and stay.

6th February

Only a quick one as we have got to get a few more miles in today. We are now in Streaky Bay and have now covered about 2000kms on the Xts. Grays bike went round the clock today so he now has a new bike.

Getting used to my bike now and am almost bonding with it, well my arse certainly is. Bum is a bit sore. Back on the now road.... Tally Hoe

6th February

Right have a bit more time now as we have got a motel room for the night the first one since we have been on the road. We left Sydney on the 30th and it was a lovely feeling to be on the road on two wheels again. We had made a few friends in the local bar and when we said goodbye everyone seemed to have an opinion the Nullarbor seemed be something of a legend. How will you get petrol? Do you know how big our Country is? Do you know what you are doing? In all everyone seemed to know all about traveling on a motorcycles but most had never done it themselves. The scare mungers were out in force. And I am not saying that we ignored them but if you listen to hard to what people say I don’t think you would step outside your door for fear of being run over by a bus or attacked by rabid flying fish. The first day we didn’t do that many miles but had a bit of fun with the bikes. Gary had read in one of the many magazines that he had been reading about that there was a trail beside a railway track.

We found the trail and didn’t really prepare for it being technical but as we got further down the track it got narrower and rougher up and down mounds then an uphill with lots of loose gravel. Gary flew up it but I didn’t, in the usual ungraceful style that I have mastered over the years, laid the XT down. We didn’t even let the tyres down and it lost grip. Nothing broken we thought of all the miles we had to do and we really couldn’t afford to break anything. The trail had turned into to deep gullies and I think if I was on my Serow I don’t think there would have been a problem. We turned back and as I went down the hill I had fallen off I went through a massive spiders web. Gary thought I had lost control of the bike again but I was just freaking out at thought of all the ozzy spiders that can hurt you and mowing ones house down I think was cause for attack mode. No spider in my helmet we carried on. Further on we then found a gravel road and thought we would have a go at that. It was amazing scenery the smell of eucalyptus and a hot dusty trail. It was what our bikes were made for. I was really enjoying it but him upstairs had other ideas. We noticed the sky was looking really black and then big old drops starting to hit us a crack of thunder and yet again we turned back for the tarmac.

We managed to out run the storm and by the time it caught up with us we had already set up our tent.

The last week has been great we have met some incredible people when you get out in to the country the people seems to change. They become a lot friendlier, we have heard so many stories. Life seems really hard. In one town we stayed the locals said that they haven’t produced any crops for seven years because of drought.

The opinions on our trip didn’t change though and the “Do you know how big our country is?” and “You have got a long way to go.” seemed to be on the tip of every ones tongue. Well we are now half way to Perth and another few long days in the saddle. My bum feels like it has been tenderized and I have got red marks where I sit. Its worth though. The open space and the long empty roads though sometimes boring gives you time to think and appreciate where you are.

Thanks again to everyone who has written to us we read all the messages and it is great to here from you all.

8th Feb

Made it across the Nullarbor and my arse feels like it has been on a butcher’s block and given a damn good beating. I can safely say that it is now more than tender. I have also got a bit of whiplash too as one road trains went past and the wind it created caught my helmet owww. Apart from that we are both fine, no major hassles. We came through the end of the Nullarbor though, as we got into the first town we had seen in days, Gary’s bike started to burp and fart. We thought we might have a celebration with a few beers and a pat on the back, but as soon as we got in the campground Gary had the tools out while I put the tent up. A new spark plug and another ride up the road, it was worse and it backfired and blew a flame out of the exhaust. Shit. We have still a 1000 kms to ride you can’t give up on us now. The tank removed and bits everywhere in a sandy ant infested campground he found that the wire to the coil was a bit iffy a squeeze with a leatherman and hoped for the best, by the time it was done it was dark and the campground asleep so we had a worried night thinking of what to do if the bike was buggered. Gary got straight on the bike in the morning and it didn’t make a wrong note, no miss fires.

A big thumbs up and smiles and back on the road. We are now in Esperance on the coast and have stopped early today as we stink and we have no clean socks. Dirty pikeys!

13th February

Well it took us 12 days in all to cross the Nullarbor and what a ride, we did the most miles we have ever done per day on any of the trips we have done. There was just nothing to stop for and a never-ending tree less road. I got a little bored one day and decided to count the dead kangaroos. In a 50 kms stretch I counted 86 in various states of decay. One morning we were met by very fresh road kills the road trains just plough in to the roos and my god it was disgusting. We were dodging in and out of red fresh Gary saw the furry foot, I just saw big chunks of flesh which I tried my best not to run over. Yuk.

We also saw emus; Gary had an urge to chase them. So he sped off into the bush after them. Emus are bloody fast and it wasn’t long before they were far away. I had a dice of my own with local wildlife and got bitten by a bull ant. My leg swelled up and it looked like an egg attached to my leg. I was really worried so we called into a local hospital. “When did yah get bit?” A nurse said as I dropped my trousers “last night.” I said very concerned. “More than 24 hours, well if ain't killed you yet then you will be ok, probably a bull ant, they can give you quite a nip.” “Nip the bloody thing has made me deformed” I got given some pills and cream and I can safely say my leg is back to normal. The critters here really scare me I was in the shower yesterday and I am surprised how calm I was when in the corner of the cubicle there was what looked like a snake. I gathered my things up walked back to the tent. It took half an hour or so before I mentioned it to Gary in passing. “Oh yeah, there was a snake in the shower earlier.” “What you took all this time to tell me that, I think you better tell someone.” I went and told the cleaner and she went in armed with a blue rubber glove. It turned out to be a legless lizard and although small tried to bite through the glove.

14th February

We are still in Bunbury and heading for Perth tomorrow. We have managed to get the bikes on the internet and in a local paper to sell. I am going to be quite sad to see Basil go. It has been so reliable and although not the best seat has been a bloody good bike. I did have visions of freighting him home but I think if we did that we wouldn’t have much money left to get us home plus I think my Dommie would get jealous. We now have 11 days to get the bikes sold and us to Singapore. I am so looking forward to the next bit but quite a lot to organize.

14th February Update

After three weeks with no information on our Dommies. We had a bill of Loading and that was about it. We were told they would be arriving in Singapore on the 25th February... I got a bit worried, as I haven’t heard anything after lots of bouncing emails and ones with no answer I have spent today in a hot room with my laptop trying to get information. It turns out that yes the ship exists (thank god for that) after our shipping disaster I was beginning to think that our bikes had been swallowed up into a big Spanish speaking dirty hole. I then found a website with the schedule for the boat. It gets in on the 20th. SHIT. Well good, it’s early, but shit, we are not there! I feel like a jockey trying to get on a run away horse. So here’s where the count down begins. We have to sell the XTS, any takers? Send all the extra stuff we bought home. Get on a plane and get to Singapore in 6 days. This should be fun.

19th February

Ok we are still in Oz. We are now staying with Lance a great guy who for his sins has let us stay. What a great place, great company and a proper bed. But what the hell are you still doing there? Your bikes are waiting in Singapore, yes the boat has docked with our crates and we can’t sell the Xts. Friggin nightmare. We have advertised the bikes taken them round to various dealers? Had people round to look at them. One guy said £2000 for the two. Ok we thought he then brought a mate round and they took them up the road. “Not much go ah?” Much go, what’s he on about it’s a trail bike not a Hyabusa. Next guy comes round decides he wants my bike and says ok £1200. “I’ll just go to the ATM and get you a deposit out ”he didn’t come back he called and said that he had another bike to look at and he thinks he will do that. I called a training school thinking that someone might have passed his or her test and want a bike. He calls me back and says he is interested so Gary and I ride through Perth. He is the boss of the training company tries my bike out wearing saddles and then brags to his mate that he tried to wheelie and then offers me £750. tosser. We then had another guy come round in ambulance (he’s the driver) He takes both bikes for a spin down the road and now has asked us to take the bikes to a Yamaha dealer to have them checked over. The Yamaha dealer said on the phone that he has a 1996 XT for sale and that is up for £2000 and then in the same breath says that mine is only worth a grand. “What my bike is only 3 years younger so how come it is half the amount of his” Bloody hell I feel like stressed Eric! We have also priced up sending the XTs home the price isn’t too bad and we can get on with the trip.

Back to the trip and we have booked or so we thought our boat to India with the Dommies with us.

Here are the e-mails so far:

“The Tiger Breeze sails from Singapore on the 20th February and the 5th March

For Chennai India.......The bikes, however, you will have to arrange locally in Singapore. Attached is a list of the Bengal Tiger Lines shipping agents contact them regarding shipping the bikes.”

Did that and here was the first reply

“Thanks yours below, unfortunately we are operating as a liner feeder and we do not have self owned container for your LCL (loose cargo). Please contact.....”

Next

“Dear Louise & Gary,

 

Please note BTL is strictly a Shippers Owned Container (SOC) feeder operator and therefore does not accept cargoes as per your description, but we have however no objection if the owners accept the 2 x Motorcycles as part of the passengers’ belongings (eg. baggages), as long as: -

 

aa. The loading & discharging of these 2 crates can be carried out via the vessel’s provision crane, without interfering with the cargo operations.

bb. All necessary documents for landing of these 2 crates/motorbikes at Chennai are obtained accordingly.”

 

Ok Cool, got a boat and we just have to sort the paperwork out (India is renowned for how easy paperwork is, Not. Oh and try and operate a ships crane to get the bikes on and off.

Just got this one through from the captain:

“Dear all,

Pls note wrt the passenger there has been issue recently with the immigration dept as they insist that vessel agents give a letter stating that agents are responsible for the passengers until they leave India. Unfortunately we are unable to do so unless it can be a back to back guarantee for which Owners will have to first give a guarantee/ under to us a agents before we accept the same.

 

Wrt the motorcycle the process of documentation at customs is tedious and it may be very difficult to clear it through customs.

The passengers/ Owners will need to employ a Agents to manifest the parcel and clear the customs (BTL Maa are no in a posn to carry out the same).

 

Warm regards

Capt Sri”

 

Well that is it for today folks will try again tomorrow. Keep you posted. This trip is like a roller coaster at Flambards, enjoy it when you are going but when you stop you wonder why you ever got on in the first place.

“I want to ride my bicycle, I want to ride my bike, I want to ride my bicycle, I want to ride it wear I like” Queen.

25th February

NEWS FLASH WE HAVE GOT THE DOMMIES BACK, Yee Haa

The last few days have been a complete crack up. So so many ups and downs but when we look back, over all, a big smile factor. We stayed with Lance in Fremantle for a week in an amazing house. Eventually sold Basil to Allan the ambulance man and I was a little sad to see him go, bought our tickets to Singapore. Then had a day to sell Cybil and the clock was ticking. While staying with Lance he went out and bought a Silver 25-year-old Rolls Royce. (What’s that got to do with selling Cybil) Well it goes something like this...

Saturday morning Lance offers to take us to the Swan Valley wine region. While on the way had a call about Cybil and he offers us $1000 after long discussions decided to take the cash and arranged to meet the guy at 7pm. Had a great lunch, wine testing and felt like the queen in this amazing car. Then on the way back had another call. This guy was stood looking at Cybil and was really interested. Now it was 6.30 one guy was on the way to give us a $1000. We came round the corner we got out of the car “Thank you driver.” Gary said to Lance, funny as hell. It was then auction time for Cybil. I couldn’t bare it and got the hell out of there. Gary eventually got $1400 of the bike. A quickly packed our stuff and then Lance drops us to the airport through Perth with the silver lady glinting in the city lights, mad.

Our flight was at 3am and pretty much didn’t get any sleep so when we got to a cheap Singapore hotel we both just flopped.

Monday was a really exciting day for us and we got to grips with the Singapore train system (which beats the underground hands down, so clean, air conditioned and video screens in the tunnels) and found our way to the warehouse. We seemed to walk miles through a maze of folk lift trucks, containers and pallets. Up some steps and then into a massive warehouse full of wooden boxes and busy people. We felt we shouldn’t be there with out seeing someone first but then Gary spotted our bikes. The crates wrapped in plastic and Elmo poking out from my bike. YES! Our faces both lit up and we shook the hand of some random worker (why we did that, who knows, we were just so pleased and felt we had to thank someone, even if he didn’t know why he was being thanked) There was a tabby cat curled up on top of my bike inside the crate, my dommie had now become the local cat coach, not for long I hoped. There was times we didn’t think we would see our bikes again. So now we just to get them out of there. We went upstairs to the office and were then told that we had to go to the head office in the city to pay and fill out some forms. Got in a taxi and into the land of high risers. Another cock up by Argentina and we were told that that we had to get the stamp from the company that were the consignee (supposed to be us). I had used the address of a printer I work with (as you always need an address when shipping) and some how the freight firm in Argentina had put them to take delivery of the bikes. Now we needed their permission to release the bikes. Hmmm, great to the end, South American bollocks, they couldn’t organize a piss up in a brewery. Yet another hurdle for us to leap over. I was really lucky as Keith the guy I deal with in England for my printing was over visiting the Singapore plant and had said that we should catch up. I gave him a call and then caught another train to meet him. We had a look around the printing plant which was unreal to see and got our forms stamped. Keith invited us for drinks at his hotel. Couldn’t believe it a high-rise hotel in the executive looking over the city, drinking wine. Ah yes we are roughing it. The next day we went back to the warehouse there was now two cats in the crate with my bike. Some feline eviction was in order before they started some cat sex games and had some badass biker kittens.

It took all morning to free the Dommies from there wooden prison and then a quick check through customs and we were spat out onto the busy Singapore roads. Bit of a culture shock from Oz. So many cars, very slow in hot muggy weather. My bike wasn’t running very well and would cut out at quarter throttle. Was a bit scary at an orange light thinking I could make it across and then going for acceleration and the bike nearly stops in the middle of a junction, shit, my heart beat a little faster but the good old Dommie got back to the hotel and in need of some TLC.

4th March

Yeah baby yeah, we are back on the road again.

Singapore was an amazing place it is such a small country only 37 miles across (approx). Lots and lots of high risers a techno feel to it with a seedy edge. We met some great people Gary spent a lot of his time down servicing the bikes while I did my nails (yeah right). We got friendly with the local bike shop, which just happened to be behind the hotel and also Baha a local guy into every kind of dirt biking possible. Don’t know where they find space here for enduros but apparently they do. After two days the bikes were ready for the off again. New oil, clean air filters and a friendly reassuring pat. Friday we left. Baha met in the morning, as he wanted to lead us to the border. His mum even made us sandwiches, which were bloody lovely. The border crossing was a doddle though the Malaysian side was a bit weird no one looking that official and we had to do a u turn on the high way to try and get someone to stamp our Carnet. Very odd but also very friendly. Welcome to Malaysia. When we were trying to organize the trip this was the one place that I really didn’t give that much attention to, I don’t know why it just slipped through the planning net. Just a name I really didn’t know what to expect. As we came into the first town and in fact all the roads leading into the town, there were flags everywhere. Blue, white green and yellow all fluttering in the wind. It is elections time on this hazy hot day, the sort of day that makes you squint at everything with the fluttering flags, bad Malaysian driving (they tail gate you really bad), monkeys on the side of the road, it made for an interesting ride. Traffic lights were really funny on the major ones there was a digital count down. There doesn’t seem to be many big bikes here, mainly step throughs with “turbo” or “twin clutch” stickers on them. They all line up revving their underpowered engines, taking the traffic light race very seriously and then there off belching out two stroke fumes and thinking there in a GP. Our bikes stood out a lot causing many a stare or a wave. In one petrol station a guy even tried to do a wheelie for us. (Managed an inch from the ground). The moped seems to be the main family transport; I counted 5 on one bike, madness.

It was getting kind of late when we pulled into the beach resort and this turned out to be our home for two days. We woke up in the middle of the night to the most horrendous storm and it didn’t stop for the whole of the next day, which happened to be my birthday. I was really worried, as a guy we spoke to the night before reckoned that the seasons had changed they had not had there usual monsoon season that was usually November, December and January and now it was raining real monsoon stuff, Christ, just our luck but all the way round people had been saying how the weather patterns had changed in there country. Suppose that’s global warming for you. So nothing for it but a few beers in town.

We have now covered 16000 kms though not on our bikes all the way, which leads me into the next Loo and Gary shipping nightmare. We tried really hard to sort out getting the Dommies into India and I am afraid to say we failed on that mission. It seems that the Indian authorities are a not easy to deal with and the best way in is to ride in from Nepal something we don’t have time to do. So hatched plan number 42G We are now sending the Dommies to Greece and riding home from there on them and we are going to get bikes in India to complete our mission.

21st March

Happy Easter to everyone and sorry that the diary has not been updated for a while. It has been a busy old time and a lot of traveling and organizing. We are now in Goa in India and have met up with Lisa and Matt (Gary’s kids) and are now staying in a hotel on a bit of a holiday.

We crossed Malaysia on the Dommies, what an amazing ride. It really is motorcycle heaven. Twisty smooth tarmac through palm trees and hills. The people so, so friendly. Everywhere we stopped some one wanted to know about the bikes and what we thought of their country. We rode east to west coast and took 3 days staying in some really cheap but plush hotels. Malaysia is made up of 4 main religions Chinese, Malay, Muslim and Indian. It is really weird to being going down the road and seeing so many different temples.

As we came into different towns the traffic got heavy and the step through bikes a plenty they buzzed in and out of the cars and scared the crap out of me, they take so many risks. On one bridge a guy came flying past me, head down near the handlebars for more speed. A truck on one side of the road and coach coming the other way. The guy on the moped just aimed for the gap in the middle. He must have shat him self, I did just watching.

We got stopped by the police for not going in the right lane as they have lanes beside the highway (a bit like our cycle paths at home) just for motorcycles. The thing is, the bikes they ride are not much bigger that a push bikes and our bikes with the luggage took up nearly all the lane. So we figured that we would stay with the cars. We got flagged down by the police (as well as lots of mopeds) and given a ticking off and told to pay £50 each. We groveled and said we wouldn’t do it again and said that if he fines us Malaysia would be the only country that had in the whole of our world trip. The policeman asked to see our passports and then said that we could go. But “shhhhhh” We hoped back on the bikes got in the right lane and headed for Panang. What a great place we thought it would be full of tourists but in fact it wasn’t too bad. We found a cheap guesthouse, which had a bar beside a beach and stayed there for a few days.

The trip plans....

We wanted to ride to Thailand and send the bikes to Europe from Bangkok we had started the arrangements with the shippers and all was looking feasible. We just had to ride 1000kms a border crossing crate the bikes and then we fly to India. On my birthday Gary had been swimming in the sea and the last few days his ear had been really sore with the helmet. It hadn’t gone away, so we went to see a doctor. He washed Gary’s ear out by pumping a syringe with warm water and then catching what ever came out in a bowl. Nice, glad I wasn’t watching as apparently it looked like fresh pineapple juice with bits in. He had an ear infection and so had to take eardrops and antibiotics. Its hard when you are on the road and have to be somewhere by a certain time, things seem to go against you. Gary couldn’t ride with such a bad ear and so we had to change our plans yet again. We sat looking over the most amazing sea view sipping beer trying to decide what to do. There was a friendly barman, he was a bit annoying as he was really loud and seemed to know everything about everything but in this case he was quite useful.

“So where do you go next?” the waiter asked.

Our story poured out “we need to send our bikes to Europe and we were going to send them from Bangkok but Gary now cant ride for a few days and we have to be in India by the 15th March”

“I used to work in the docks in Penang for 3 years, they have boats bound for Europe. Get the ferry to the mainland in Georgetown and then ask a taxi driver to take to you the docks, there are lots of freight forwarders there”

We didn’t even know there was a dock so to find out that we may be able to send the bikes from there made a shit load of sense and Gary could get better before we flew. The next day we caught a taxi down town and a friendly taxi driver again asked our story. We told him about how we needed a shipper to send our motorcycles, he got on the phone and with in five minutes he handed the phone over to Gary. It was a friend of his wife’s cousin or something and he was a shipping agent. By that afternoon we had a quote on the e-mail and we started making the arrangements. Who needs to do research on the Internet all you need to do is go to a bar and then catch a cab. We moved hotels to be closer to town and stayed in a very cheap clean guesthouse. Gary then got an eye infection and then both of us got ill with fevers. We thought at one point we had dengue fever. Gary was worse than me he just poured with sweat and was so weak. Another visit to a doctor and more pills and a blood test. “Come back on Friday and we will give you a test to see if you have dengue fever”

Shit, when someone says you have an illness and gives it a dodgy name I think you feel worse.

We tried to book our flights on the Internet and had a nightmare with it. It seems that in Malaysia you have to have paper tickets. We bough our tickets in a travel agents and just hoped Gary’s results would be ok.

Another shipping

The Dommies had spent more time on ship than on the road. Gary felt a little better and we rode to the crate makers. We were going to put the bikes in there own crates but it turned out in the end to be cheaper to put them in there own container. Really strange to put our two bikes in a massive 20 foot container. They were wrapped in what looked like cling film and fork lifted into the container, which was on the back of a waiting lorry. We got a lift with the lorry driver to the port so we could get the bikes through customs. This was another fun experience. The lorry driver was called Wan and was Indian. “Do you like Indian food” he asked. “Yes nice we both said though neither of us were in the mood for a curry. “We have to wait to take the bikes to the port so I thought we could go to my temple” “Ok” we said, its not everyday you go to an Indian temple for lunch. We pulled up outside the temple and he left the lorry running. We were met at the door of the temple by all of his family “This wife, this mother these my children”. We took our shoes off at the door and followed the colourfully dressed family through the temple. We waited in a queue in like a canteen area. Gary and I felt really out of place but very welcome. We got shown to some seats and a big banana leaf placed in front of us then guys with big pots of rice and curry ladled there wares onto our leaves. We had to eat with our hand (the right one) my Christ, what a mess. Gary and I by the end of it might as well have just dunked our heads straight in it. Really nice though and what an experience. Lunch finished we drove to the port. A few hours later and our bikes container were flying through the air and on its way to Greece. What a relief.

The next day we went back to the doctors and was told that there were no doctors on a Friday. Gary felt a bit better and so decided that as he was getting better day-by-day that it wasn’t Dengue. The next day we flew to India. It took us 21 hour to get to Goa and a night with out sleep. Even to get to the right bit of the airport seemed to be an expedition in itself. No signs, no seats and lots of different official looking people telling you the wrong things. We eventually found our way to the domestic flights bit of the airport and then had a 5-hour wait for Gary’s kids to get in. There were some seats that we took over with the luggage and us and were then told we couldn’t wait there. “Why, we asked.” 30 Rupees to sit. “But we are waiting for my children” Gary said. What flight are they on and we then had to tell him all the details of there flight. “Ok, you may sit” Well thanks mate didn’t realize seats were so precious and important.

Lisa and Muff’s flight came in and they seemed to be the last through the arrival gate. Gary was having kittens “they’ve missed it, something’s happened.” But all came good and all the planning and stress had paid off we got here on time. And had great hugs and smiles as a reward!

The next bit of the trip is going to be kind of weird we were hoping to buy bikes here and then sell them like we had done in Australia. Indian rules had changed recently and now the new ruling was that no one could buy a vehicle unless they were an Indian resident. This now has put a different slant on things. We sent our bikes onto Europe for fear that we would not get them through customs. Really glad we did, as India seems to be full of silly little rules, regulations and red tape even to get a sim card for your phone you have to give a passport photo and a copy of your passport. So the plan is now to rent two Enfield Gary has just gone to see if he can find the rental place. It would means that we wont be able to go up North as we first planned but I think there is plenty to see here. Will try and keep the website updated but the Internet cafes here are really slow.

2nd April

After two lovely weeks relaxing with Lisa and Mathew it was time to get back to the business of our trip. Goa had been wonderful and like taking a holiday with in a holiday if that makes sense. We made friends with a lot of the hotel staff and the local taxi drivers. Robert turned out to be more than just your average cabby. He seemed to know where to get anything you wanted, be it a trip to see dolphins or a random person who didn’t mind us borrowing their Royal Enfields for a few weeks. Our first plan was to buy two new Enfields, then Gary wanted to take one home, bigger than your average snowy scene glass dome but this plan turned out to be not possible in Goa. In the Enfield dealership in Panaji a grey haired salesman explained that we could not buy a bike in India and ride it here unless we put it in the name of a local Indian. We could however just send one home and he wouldn’t have a problem. Not helping our coast to coast plan though. We came back from the shop feeling a bit dejected. We had been hiring a Pulsar 150cc wizzy machine from Robert and we commented to him that we really wanted to ride Enfields. “No problem” he said “follow me” he wondered out of the hotel and into a neighbours house. Came out with some keys and uncovered the 350 Enfield Bullet. It looked like something my granddad used to ride. It’s looks were not helped by the fact that its owner had coated it in antirust treatment which although would stop it going rusty had made all the chrome look like it was decaying. Gary took it up the road “bop bop bop” he came back looking quite pleased with himself.

It was my turn for a test ride and my Christ what a learning curve gears on the wrong side, one up instead of one down. Reality crap drum brakes which I suppose could be aided with sticking your feet out in an emergency and then there was starting the thing I haven’t kicked a bike since I was 16 and that was only a 50 cc DT. A bit of different to this machine. I couldn’t start it so decided to just try and ride it. I went down the road and also came back with a smile. Peter the guy who owned the bike agreed to lend it to us and it would be £100 for the 16 days we needed it. Robert sourced another Enfield from one of his many contacts and we hired a rack for our luggage.

Gary’s kids left on the Sunday. It was really weird being back at the hotel with out them there, it made us both a bit home sick and sad. On this whole trip neither of us had been homesick mainly because we had been so busy planning the next leg. We packed, had a few too many beers and by Monday afternoon we were ready for the off. We had a rough route planned and Robert gave us various route tips. “Don’t ride at night and at the statue with the lone horseman take a left” or was that right. Anyway it didn’t seem to matter at the time we just wanted to get on the road again.

Our exit was more than embarrassing for me, lots of people watching, I climbed aboard and tried to start my steed. The bike was in gear and as I kicked I lost my balance. The bike tipped over and I had a red-faced moment of being helped to pick it up and someone else starting it for me. What a tit, these poor people were lending their bike to a girl for one thing and one that couldn’t even start the bike. As I rode off I wished the world would swallow me up and even now I cringe at the thought. Never mind. Coast to coast India here we come.

India is renowned for its bad roads, bad driving, and sheer volume of vehicles. I can’t count the amount of times I said F**ck, Sh*t or bloody hell in the first half an hour. My eyes on stalks, cars, trucks, tut tuts and bikes all flow along roads with no rules. Biggest wins and loudest horn also has a part to play in the pecking order on the road. Gary’s bikes had no mirrors and mine no horn. This place is mental. It’s too much for your brain to deal with cows, pigs, water buffalo’s, and oxen wonder beside a road with cracks, potholes and speed bumps like whoops.

What the hell have we done? And for our next trick ladies and gentleman we will now attempt to ride archaic motorcycles across a mad assault course called India.

The day went on and so did the road. Before we left we had said to Peter (the Enfields owner) that we would not ride the bikes at night the shadows were getting longer and the sun hung low in the dusty air. The potholes and the dirt road were not getting any better and it was making me feel a bit seasick. At one point Gary said that I actually got air on a decaying bridge, it was so bad the re bar was sticking out like a stinger. The ride was really hard work trying to avoid the bad bits. My bike bottomed out a few times and the folk seals had started to leak. I still wasn’t used to the back brake on the wrong side and I kept grabbing a handful of front brake. Gary had stopped to wait for me and just before him was a massive hole the width of the road. I tried to brake but again grabbed the front brake. I hit sand on the road and then fell off. “You ok?” Gary asked. Nothing hurt too much. I was now covered in red dust and the bike had a bent foot rest and back brake. We had no time to discuss me falling off we still had 50 kms to ride and we knew that we were going to be riding it in the dark. The light drew dim my lights on the Enfield like candles. There were still so many things on the road to avoid, trucks with no lights, oxen pulling carts, and traffic overtaking beeping and nearly heading you off what there was of tarmac. We came into a town and my senses had gone from red alert to brown alert, as they say in red dwarf. We pulled up outside an Internet café and the guy who worked there offered to show us to a hotel. He climbed on the back of Gary’s bike and I followed as close I could. Thank fuck. I was so, so glad to get off the bike and it took me a few hours to calm down. I had been gripping on so much both my thumbs had gone numb. I had a nice graze on my knee my ribs hurt I can safely say that was one of the hardest days of the whole trip.

8th April

We have now made it to Madras or Chennai as it is now called. We have had hell of a journey. It has been the hardest 1200 kms we have done yet. It is hard to put into words how you feel when riding here, there are so many thinks going on that you almost become part of a big scary fair ground ride. Colours, smells, people and then there is the road which has its own scary elements to it. Trucks that come straight towards you overtaking other trucks and the only thing you can do is aim for the dirt beside the road. When you do get a chance, which isn’t that often to take a breather from the chaos, there is always someone wanting to talk to you. “Which Country you came from? What is your name? And do you like India?” And then if you stay there too long “Are you married, how many children do you have?” followed by a head wobble and a smile. I got caught outside one hotel while Gary was looking at a room for the night and a crowd surrounded me all asking questions it was like being interrogated. Bra size didn’t come up but I am sure they were getting to it.

Riding the Royal Enfield has been like trying to nurturing two OAPs to do a Marathon. The good thing being that there is always a mechanics shop and they all know about Enfields. It gives you a chance to meet people and we have met a few, the list so far

Loo's bike

New back wheel bearing

New tyre (to be fair we should have fitted before we left)

Gear selector spring

New split link in chain (we would at home throw the chain away but not here, the chain lives on)

Fork adjustment

Clutch oil top up

Head gasket fixed in a 1 hour 10 minutes

Egg shaped wheel, which we didn’t fix but made the handle bars go up and down a bit like a merry go round

Front puncture, which coupled with the bent wheel, was so horrible

Gary’s bike

Folk seals

Tappets adjustment

Front break light switch

Gear sector adjustment before we left

Bits bent by Loo... Back break lever, footrest and front mud guard, opps.

And we have still to ride back to Goa.

15th April

The Enfield’s are now tucked up with their owners and the sight of the hotel after the two weeks in the mayhem was such a welcome sight. “Did you have a nice trip?” the hotel man behind the desk asked. Where do I start? So my reply was just a simple “yes, great, it was lovely to see the real India.

I am afraid to say that I lied, this had been the scariest experience of my life and I was so glad to have escaped the journey with only a few bruises.

Everyday we saw at least three carcasses of vehicles crashed, burnt or mangled. The driving is crazy and you can’t take your eye off the road for a second. I lost count of how many times I got driven off the road. One in particular I remember was a mini bus. It was in between two trucks I could only see the trucks and then he decided to overtake the truck. He could see me but just kept coming “You f**ckin toser wanker mother f**cker” I aimed for the side of the road The Enfield got air and then down the bank I just kept thinking “back brake, back brake,” and then managed to guide the bike back onto the road and tarmac. I got away with it. I was so angry I could have hit the guy spark out. This was really the final straw for me I really had had enough of being scared witless every five minutes, my nerves a jangle.

I will type up a more in-depth blog later as Gary has written his web bit and is now bored, so have to find the child some entertainment.

22nd April

Well yet another story and another shipping nightmare. Where to begin.... I don’t know whether it is our stupidity, or our luck but either way we arrived in Greece full of the joys of spring. Leaving India wasn’t hard, as we both had had enough of the dirt grime and mayhem of the place. I just wanted a Greek salad and some food with out a hand full of spices that hurt your bum hole on exit and our bikes so we could ride home. Home, as the plane came to land at Greece I had a little tear in my eye. “We are nearly there, we’ve nearly done it.” We hired a car and headed for a cheap hotel. In the morning I was awake and ready to tackle the shipping agents. It seemed to take so long for the clock to say nine o clock but didn’t want to ring to early and get some poor security guard.

The phone call.

“Hi may name is Louise Hillier and we have a container coming into Piraeus, Is it there, I have the reference numbers if you need them.”

“One moment please” was the answer. And I was then put on hold. Another lady came on the phone. “Your name please.”

“ Yes my name is Louise Hillier and we have two motorcycles coming in reference number.....”

“Yes, Yes you have two motorcycle and you want to ride them out of port, is this correct?”

“Yes, are the bikes there in port now?” I said almost jumping with glee.

“One moment please I will check.” The phone went dead for a minute and then she came back on the line.

“Your motorcycles have left mother ship and are in Port Side.”

“Wow excellent, they have left the mother ship and are on the portside. So can we collect them this afternoon? “

Gary’s face said it all, the blonde with no geography and not a good understanding of Greek pigeon English had led me to the complete wrong country. The bikes were in Egypt and they had unloaded our bikes there because there was port strikes in Greece and now they did not know when they would arrive.

I can’t believe this is happening to us again, all the feelings came back of the frustration and complete hopelessness of Australia. It was like a dentist drill as soon as you hear it you straightaway get tooth ache.

Bollocks. We had four very expensive days in Greece saw some great scenery and met some lovely people but it would have been so much better if we had had our bikes. This was just yet another problem that had to be solved and no amount of whining was going to change that. Lots of phone calls and a few days, we had a vague plan. Change port destination.... Italy.... Bikes arrive 29th PLEASE.

We are now on a ferry and are heading for Italy; Bikes should arrive Genoa 29th and have cost a lot more than any sane person would spend on shipping. The credit card is now taking a pounding. Cant wait to see everyone back home early May.